I love you, funny face!

[Fox Mulder]

1. Since her baby left, she's found a new place to dwell. It's right on the edge of Lonely Street...
2. Alaska has St.Bernards with whiskey casks on their collars. California deserts have busty babes with jugs of lemonade.
3. Grandma's got a little something for you. What? You were expecting cookies?
4. Kinda makes you want to be a horse, doesn't it?
5. Mayberry was never the same again after Sheriff Andy Taylor's new girlfriend hit town.
6. John was so lazy...it seemed Cindy had to do EVERYTHING in their marriage.
7. It was a great picture...until the ground started to shake and suddenly Rachel was living a scene from Raiders of The Lost Ark.
8. Crazy women need sex too.
9. Mt. TUSHmore?
10. When it comes to sex, enthusiasm makes all the difference. More or less.

[Fox Mulder]

1. Chandler Bing from "Friends" might say: "Can there BE a more inconvenient time for a home invasion robbery?!!!"
2. Suzie lets her abusive jerk husband know just how many of his buddies she slept with while he was on his business trip.
3. Graveyard ghosts are getting much better looking these days. Either that or Crazy Sally has busted loose from the clinic again.
4. She was drawn here...so obsessed with the image she once sculpted in her mashed potatoes...now she was here... fulfulling her destiny...and as the alien ship flew over her...she reacted as Richard Dreyfus always knew she would. (Missed the movie? Too bad)
5. I try to follow my girlfriend around the house in much the same way.
6 Ho hum...another typical day for James Bond.
7. As part of the NFL's new concussion protocols, if players report this as the first thing they see on the field after a head blow, they are immediately rushed to a hospital. No NFL trainers dress quite like this.
8. "You are guilty of having a left breast! You have to do my physics homework for the week." (College can be a confusing time.)
9 When horny X Ray techs have too much time on their hands...

[Ghost In Oblivion]

For the first time in OCC history, we have possible proof of the supernatural! Here we have two lovely milfs cumming for no apparent reason. They aren't touching themselves. No one seems to be touching them. But look at their faces.Something is giving them intense orgasms!

Could it be...me?

Just because you can't see ghosts it doesn't mean our tongues don't work.

[Fox Mulder]

1. Apparently Ghost is also a skirt lifting voyeur too.
2. No Ghost here...just a $%#&ing bikini thief!
3. When the magic in your love affair is all but gone...
4. "Attention Home Depot shopper's...take advantage of our Manager's Special on Aisle Five...free blowjobs with your purchase of a big ass fuckin'bag of dog food!" (Don't you wish shopping was really like this?)
5. Yep. Now's the time to take all those nudie pictures she's been refusing to pose for.
6. Wow...she's out Daisy Duke'n Daisy Duke! (And Donald Trump doesn't know who David Duke is...)
7. And now I'd like you to open up your hearts and pocket books for another "I Love You Funny Face" cause: Millions of senior women are living alone with no lovers come to call. All the loving they ever get requires AAA batteries. "I Love You Funny Face" has a team of gigolos waiting to please these lonely ladies, but getting them to the needy is expensive. Please send your monetary donations to OCC care of "I Love You Funny Face/Fuck the Grandmas." (Do it quick before the mods catch on!)

[Fox Mulder]

1. I don't know what happens next...but potentially it could be something very surprising and possibly very bad.
2. When you're filthy rich you don't have to settle for fast food in front of the TV.
3. Best. Selfie. Ever.
4. When your need for attention outweighs your dignity.

[Timbo]

Originally Posted by Fox Mulder

5. And speaking of dogs, why do I think this photo might give Scooby Doo an erection? (Shaggy too)

Scooby Dooby Dooooo!

[Fox Mulder]

1. Anyone who has ever seen Rebecca/Aeon's normally raunchy, sexy pictures would find this "slaving over a hot iron" picture as amusing, as I did. The only house work I can imagine her doing is rinsing off her sex toys.
2. Helen, contemplating the possibility of Donald Trump in the White House, is suddenly very, very depressed... ( me too)
3. But Megan thinks there's no need for wide spread panic yet: "Let's just see how it all shakes out," says she.
4. When she told her boyfriend she wanted to see the Tigers, she meant the Detroit baseball team.
5. "Can you hear me now?"
6. When it comes to talking dirty, Katie has such a foul mouth she has to wear a condom on her tongue so you won't get STDs.

[Fox Mulder]

1. I know she thinks she's being sexy...but aren't you just a little creeped out?
2. The ATMs in Sweden are waaaay cooler than the ones in the rest of the world.
3. Yeah, the tongue feels good...but aren't you just a little creeped out?
4. Sure, she's letting you cum on her face...but aren't you...well, you know.
5. Erin was never quite the same after her Food Channel cooking show was cancelled.
6. "Yeah, so my wife and I have a little beach house not so far from here...would you like to come over and watch the Republican debate?"
(How things work in the swing states...looks like he's ready to cock us...er caucus!)

[Fox Mulder]

1. Ginger tried desperately to take matters into her own hands to assert control over her insatiable red pussy, but it had a will of it's own.
2. Fiona just got the news that if she removes her nipple rings her breasts will explode like two milky hand grenades. (Never get your breast job from an ex army surgeon.)
3. The obvious caption here is "Not tonight, I've got a headache."
But tonight I prefer:
Karen awoke in her own bed beside her husband. She felt a little disoriented. At first she thought she had dreamed the whole thing. But the TV was still on ESPN...and she realized it was all true. Peyton Manning has really retired. (Thanks for the memories #18)

[Fox Mulder]

1. "Make a wish!"

2. {" So you say you'd sleep with me if only your redheaded neice wasn't on board?"
3. {"Whaaaaaaa?!?" ( No one could explain how and why the boat suddenly learched forward...)

4. At " A Shrine to Kata and Her Beauty" a small sacrifice is made.
5. "Really? A dog? What the fuck is wrong with you people?"