how to get husband to allow me to have lover

[sonalsinghsl*t]

I see many on here are experienced in or with the multiple love partners over your life, or in swinging or that sort of thing. I have only been with my husband for penetration and I want so badly to give myself over to a man of size and staying power it is obsessing me. I would love for it to happen in a way that is not the cheating. How does a woman that has only been with one man tell the man that she wants more without ruining everything?

[xxxxenophile]

Originally Posted by sonalsinghsl*t

I see many on here are experienced in or with the multiple love partners over your life, or in swinging or that sort of thing. I have only been with my husband for penetration and I want so badly to give myself over to a man of size and staying power it is obsessing me. I would love for it to happen in a way that is not the cheating. How does a woman that has only been with one man tell the man that she wants more without ruining everything?

It's difficult - many men would be very threatened by your desire. Ironically, the ones who would not be, are usually the kind of man that doesn't let you get bored or dissatisfied in the first place!

It will help if you think he has any desire to have sex with other people, too. It's hard to guess that, but sometimes you can show your excitement about topics like swinging or group sex parties that are mentioned in movies or jokes. If he's paying attention, he'll notice and let you know he would be interested.

Maybe you could try things like "I want us to be closer together - let's share our fantasies..." and see if that conversation makes him uncomfortable...

Good luck!

[Uncle_Bud]

Originally Posted by sonalsinghsl*t

I see many on here are experienced in or with the multiple love partners over your life, or in swinging or that sort of thing. I have only been with my husband for penetration and I want so badly to give myself over to a man of size and staying power it is obsessing me. I would love for it to happen in a way that is not the cheating. How does a woman that has only been with one man tell the man that she wants more without ruining everything?

Are there any other men in your life that are just friends?..that you have known for awhile..that show an interest?..There are, you're just not aware of it..yet....With the weather warming up soon, it's the perfect opportunity to reveal yourself more..If I lived closer, I'd help you out..good luck..

[DRDavenport]

MrWooHoo and I have the same experience. And the same advice.

Cheating is NOT going to be good for your marriage. Don't do it unless you are looking for a lot of grief.

When we're in the mood, my wife and I prefer to go to a swing club and play anonymously with other couples that interest us (and are interested in us). No relationship other than sex play. We DON'T meet other couples and "swap".

I am under the impression you live in India. I don't know if there exist any such swing clubs near you. There is probably at least one in every major city in North America and Europe.

DR

[sonalsinghsl*t]

Originally Posted by MrWooHoo

ask yourself "how would I feel about seeing him enjoy another woman?". If your first thought is that you couldn't handle it, then why would you ask him to do the same? Now, I don't know either of you of course. Perhaps he would enjoy the idea of you playing with others without him. If that's your plan, and as you haven't yet brought up the idea, my comments still stand and it's just as important to ask and consider his needs whatever they may be.

I think I could definately handle something for him too, but I fear that I am not having much to put into the trade- his 45 seconds with the woman for the man pleasing me for many many thrusts. Maybe a hard bargain to be striking. Thanks so much for the pointers, however.

[sonalsinghsl*t]

Originally Posted by Uncle_Bud

Are there any other men in your life that are just friends?..that you have known for awhile..that show an interest?..There are, you're just not aware of it..yet....With the weather warming up soon, it's the perfect opportunity to reveal yourself more..If I lived closer, I'd help you out..good luck..

Thanks for your offer of helping. There are other men we know that are attractive to me and that I have wondered about sexually or that I have heard things about sexually from their wives or lovers. Finding a candidate for my fulfillment seems like it would be easy. I think my husband know there is missing somethings for sure in the penetration department, but I have never expressly voiced dissatisfaction clearly. The dropping of hints in that regard are not getting picked up upon by him.

[sonalsinghsl*t]

Originally Posted by DRDavenport

Cheating is NOT going to be good for your marriage. . . . I am under the impression you live in India.DR

I am in the US living now and my husband is American. I only seek to explore with his blessing at this point. Thanks so much. But does a lady say to life mate "let's go to the swinging club" outright so? Thanks again for all the thoughts from you.

[elske]

I don't think you can just bring up the idea and tell your husband you want to have sex with another guy.
He will find it very disturbing.
However, all guys want to have sex with more girls and maybe that's the direction you could use.
I'm not sure what kind of guy your husband is - is he a liberal person?
Do you talk about sex? or do you just do it?
Do u guys ever talk about your fantasies? do you watch erotic movies together?
That's you starting point?
If the answer to the above questions is yes - then how about you bring up the idea of swingers? and that you find the idea arousing... see how he reacts ... ask him if he would like to watch swingers do it?
That would be the starting direction imho...

[flashjohn]

I would suggest that you begin by asking him if HE ever has fantasies of sex with another woman, and maybe you could bring another woman with you. After that, you could discuss the idea of how hot it might be for you to have sex with another couple in the room.

Then, move on to saying that maybe you could just touch another man & he could touch another woman during sex. After that is realized, you could suggest more and more.

Eventually, I bet he will be ok with you being fucked by another man.

Good Luck, and I hope to see more naked pics of you!!

John

[ttttttbd]

Originally Posted by sonalsinghsl*t

The dropping of hints in that regard are not getting picked up upon by him.

My generic advice: if you want a man to understand you or you want him a problem to be solved, wait for the right moment, and then tell him what you need (understanding or problem solving), and tell him your opinion completely and explicitly, pinpoint what needs action on his part, and ask him explicitly to do that action. Dropping hints doesn't work for most men, or eventually it might turn out to be much worse than being completely quiet.