Erotic Quotes You Can't Forget

[ChrSld]

"You can see, I'm on my period. Then you have to fuck my asshole!"

It was said by a woman I had met online less than 24 hours earlier. Blond, very tall (taller than me), skinny type and 29 years old. She had told me earlier she was on her period, then this quote came as a surprise factor, as I wasn't expecting sex. I could never forget this quote, but also coudn't forget that tight asshole!

[Ranger 1]

Years ago when my wife and I were naked, on a blanket, in a woods. She's very reserved.
I was three-fingering her and her eyes were rolling back.
Me "What do you want?"
Her "You know."
Me "Tell me what you want."
Her "Fuck me."
Me "Where do you want me to fuck you?"
Her "You know."
Me "Tell me where you want me to fuck you."
Her "In my c*nt."
Me "So tell me what you want."
Her "I want you to fuck me in my c*nt."
Me - Like a gentleman I obliged. Who wouldn't. She did have a nice c*nt.
Until then I had never heard her utter the fuck and c*nt words - and she hasn't used them since.

[explorer98]

Originally Posted by MFN

I was good friends with a cute female coworker, both of us married to others, so we behaved and never messed around with each other; just pals enjoying each others' company. But the others in our crew just assumed we were always up to something, so we just let them think what they wanted to think. One day we're all together just arrived at a new field office, choosing where to stash our personal gear. My friend found two stacked cabinets, and loud enough for the rest to hear, she says to me "You were on the bottom last time, now I think it's your turn to be on top."

Here's a quote you've probably all heard: Two women chatting, one asks the other "Do you usually smoke after having sex?" The other one answers: "Gosh, I don't know, I never looked down there."

And another: Q: What 3 words do you never want to hear when you're upstairs having sex? A: "Honey, I'm home!"

Which reminds me....

It's a little deviation from the thread but it still makes me laugh 40-plus years later!

My then girlfriend and I (17, maybe 18 at the time) were banging away on her parents' sofa one day while they were away and the radio was on at the time. Things were quite energetic until the point where Paul Burnett suddenly cut through with "...and whatever you're doing, you're doing it better with Radio One!"

And almost instantly, I wasn't!!!

[likemslick]

There was a 4 some on the "big" screen and one of the actors says "you gotta nice ass, I think I'll fuck it!".
Later in the movie a couple was doing it in the tub soaping each other up and a patron yells "just having some good clean fun!".

[Reston]

As soon as she walked in the door, I took her suit case. We hugged. I kissed her, then I asked "How was your trip?"

She said, "He fucked me."

About about an hour or so later my wife showed me me these pix on her phone. I made her tell me every detail.

We fucked like animals.

[Gnome72141]

My friends were getting divorced. I went to see the wife to hang out and chat, given we had been friends for 20 years. She said, "God, I have to get this divorced finalized quickly. I have a list of 10 guys I am going to fuck the day I sign those papers. If you weren't married, you'd be near the top of that list. God, I love men so much and their dicks." This friend was, I thought, rather conservative sexually. They ended up not getting divorced, though.

My mother in law, who is a very conservative alt right religious type, overheard me say, "Well, the primary purpose of sex is to reproduce and save our species," then from another room, I heard her say, rather upset, "No, sex is really fun. You can have a lot of fun having sex. I have had fun in so many places having sex!" Hearing an ultra conservative 70yo say that in front of extended family was interesting to say the least!

My fun sister in law (not my wife's sister) said to me while we were doing dishes on a trip, "Her brother [my wife's brother] is such a freak in bed. He won't let me talk about it to anyone, but I am hoping he will let me share all the details with you. He's such a freak. I just can't keep it to myself any more." She has yet to tell me, and it's been almost 10 years now. I bring it up to her from time to time, and her smile is just enormous.

30-ish years ago while working retail, these girls were talking and giggling about sex (many were still virgins but wouldn't admit it because they were basically college age), and it was obvious that they were making things up. One of the older women employees was standing there, and she said, "My husband's cock tears me up inside every time. It's not good sex until I feel the pain of him ripping my pussy to shreds." That ended the sex talk at work forever. The girls were so shocked, they didn't know what to say.

My best platonic female friend just after high school was telling me about having friends at her apartment pool when her bikini top came up and she was slow putting it down because she said it was fun seeing the guys stare. She said, "But if you were there, I would have been pissed if you looked," which made me feel bad, but then she said, "Damn, as soon as you leave, I am going to masturbate for like an hour thinking about it, though." Later that night I asked her if she masturbated after I left, and she said, "Like I would tell you, but, yes, I think I am good for a day or two."

[1michael]

I went out with a playful girlfriend that did nothing but tell me Naughty Poems and plenty of them!
It's funny that I still remember many of them today, but she told me that's what the girls did at work saying or making up these things!

There once was a Young Soldier from Bates that went out on a pair of skates!
He fall on his Cutlass, that rendered him Nut less and practically useless on Dates~!


More to come if this is Ok?

[Movement37]

After fingering a girls ass she whispered, "I feel young, virginal and violated".... Super hot and the only squirter I've had.

[Barmixer]

"You have a beautiful cock " as she proceeded to suck me off!

[1michael]

Coming home from a night at the BAR I happen to see my buddy's sister walking home, so I stopped to give her a ride home! I did notice that she had just about as many drinks as I had from another BAR, so we started some playful talk~
I pulled into a dark Private parking place and we started doing some thrilling tongue swapping!
I can't remember if I had more on my mind, but I didn't feel her off yet!
The next thing I knew was she had my pants opened up and my growing cock out!
She said in a loud statement, "I just Love cock" - then she went down and started doing oral on me while rubbing my Balls too! When it was time for me to CUM, I tried to either back out or lift her head up but she kept it down and I got to CUM in her mouth!
While she was doing it, I did get to feel her tits and get a little grope on her crotch!
I later got to do the same with her stunning girlfriend that she always was hanging out with, but I felt bad cause it was her GF that I wanted to go out with more!