Social nudity and people looking at your naked SO

[Shihoin]

My wife and I have been social nudists for a few years now. We stay naked the entire time we're at the resort. Needless to say, my wife has been viewed naked more times than I can count. Here are some of my thoughts on it.

I personally am not into candaulism (no judgement on those that are). I'm just comfortable with the fact that people are going to see my wife naked. If we're in the hot tub, and I see some guy eyeballing my wife's apple out of the corner of his eye as she walks out of the hot tub: I'm amused. If she's bent over laying out her towel or going through her purse: I know it's going to get attention; and I'm having fun looking around to see who's watching. If she's sitting by the pool with her legs open, and I see some guys in the pool doing a double-take at her vajajay: I just find it perfectly natural.

To me, it's all about what my wife is comfortable with. She knows she's being seen. But she likes to be in control of how she's being seen; and by whom. So it varies, and I just go along with it. When she first started out she had "exhibitionist energy" and prided herself on putting it "all out there" with open legs and a shaven kitty (she wanted to be the hottest chick by the pool, so she always went further than "that other girl"). She's a bit more "jaded" now that so many people have seen her naked so many times; but she will still occasionally surprise me. Last year we were playing pool with another couple; and my wife's constantly bending over and wiggling her apple actually gave a dude an erection. And she thought it was flattering!

People often like to box in nudists with either "exhibitionist" or "purist" labels. I think most of us are somewhere in the middle. Social nudity can be playful without being "hyper sexualized" (again, no judgement on swingers or exhibitionists). I like that people can see my wife naked - from literally every angle - and it puts a smile on their face. I'm proud of the fact that the sight of her naked apple bouncing around can cause an erection (even though that would have caused him some issues if a "purist" had seen it). It's a compliment and a testament to my wife's attractiveness.
No wide-mouthed intense gawking though! That's crossing a line!

[coupleak]

Very nice description of how your wife and yourself experience social nudity.
In fact, it has many similarities to the experience my wife and I have.
Differences to be noted:
1) my wife would love to experience us making love while others watch us from up close. Maybe even let them cum on her body. We've done this on cam and it was really thrilling and exciting. I never knew my wife could get so wet and horny as those times during cam sessions.

2) personally I would love to watch my wife with 1 or 2 other guys going all the way. When exploring this fantasy while making love, she usually is not open to it ... but it has happened a few times that she was so horny that she indicated willing to do so. So I'm still keeping my hopes up

[Hamburgny69]

Originally Posted by coupleak

Very nice description of how your wife and yourself experience social nudity.
In fact, it has many similarities to the experience my wife and I have.
Differences to be noted:
1) my wife would love to experience us making love while others watch us from up close. Maybe even let them cum on her body. We've done this on cam and it was really thrilling and exciting. I never knew my wife could get so wet and horny as those times during cam sessions.

2) personally I would love to watch my wife with 1 or 2 other guys going all the way. When exploring this fantasy while making love, she usually is not open to it ... but it has happened a few times that she was so horny that she indicated willing to do so. So I'm still keeping my hopes up

Have you two ever tried going to an adult theater? You could ease into one or both of your fantasies

[falegname]

Originally Posted by Shihoin

I like that people can see my wife naked - from literally every angle [...] I'm proud of the fact that the sight of her naked apple bouncing around can cause an erection [...] It's a compliment and a testament to my wife's attractiveness.

Are you sure "you're not into caudalism"?

[Shihoin]

Originally Posted by falegname

Are you sure "you're not into caudalism"?

Good point!

Caundalism is much more "confronting." For example if I was applying sunscreen to my wife's back; and I purposely opened her legs and pulled her buttcheeks apart while rubbing sunscreen in, so that people could get a nice anus view: that would be caundalism. I've seen this done more openly at nude beaches; and to some guys it's an "invitation" to cuckholding. And if I did that my wife would jump and ask me "WTF?!" LOL!

[santilo]

Originally Posted by Shihoin

My wife and I have been social nudists for a few years now. We stay naked the entire time we're at the resort. Needless to say, my wife has been viewed naked more times than I can count. Here are some of my thoughts on it.

I personally am not into candaulism (no judgement on those that are). I'm just comfortable with the fact that people are going to see my wife naked. If we're in the hot tub, and I see some guy eyeballing my wife's apple out of the corner of his eye as she walks out of the hot tub: I'm amused. If she's bent over laying out her towel or going through her purse: I know it's going to get attention; and I'm having fun looking around to see who's watching. If she's sitting by the pool with her legs open, and I see some guys in the pool doing a double-take at her vajajay: I just find it perfectly natural.

To me, it's all about what my wife is comfortable with. She knows she's being seen. But she likes to be in control of how she's being seen; and by whom. So it varies, and I just go along with it. When she first started out she had "exhibitionist energy" and prided herself on putting it "all out there" with open legs and a shaven kitty (she wanted to be the hottest chick by the pool, so she always went further than "that other girl"). She's a bit more "jaded" now that so many people have seen her naked so many times; but she will still occasionally surprise me. Last year we were playing pool with another couple; and my wife's constantly bending over and wiggling her apple actually gave a dude an erection. And she thought it was flattering!

People often like to box in nudists with either "exhibitionist" or "purist" labels. I think most of us are somewhere in the middle. Social nudity can be playful without being "hyper sexualized" (again, no judgement on swingers or exhibitionists). I like that people can see my wife naked - from literally every angle - and it puts a smile on their face. I'm proud of the fact that the sight of her naked apple bouncing around can cause an erection (even though that would have caused him some issues if a "purist" had seen it). It's a compliment and a testament to my wife's attractiveness.
No wide-mouthed intense gawking though! That's crossing a line!

I totally agree. My wife and I have practiced a lot of nudism and in addition to being a very comfortable way to the beach or other pleasant moments, it can also be a good way to show off the beauty of the wife.
We on the beach are on our own, but sometimes, for whatever reason, there is an opportunity to have a fun time and that is very exciting.
For example, when I took these photos of him years ago, we were quietly in a discreet place on the beach, and a boy stood near us, in a bathing suit and allegedly reading a book, but from a position where he had a privileged view of my wife. .
She liked that boy's attitude and he was sunbathing in positions where he could look at her at ease.
Sorry for the poor quality of the photos.

[Shihoin]

Originally Posted by visa0061

I really hate to break it to you but: You are a "candaulist." Simple as that.

[helloyo2120]

I like the idea of my wife being naked in social situations. But I'm more of a bdsm/dom-sub/enf enthusiast. So as much as I would enjoy being at a nude beach with my wife where everyone is naked, I would much prefer a pool party where my wife is the only one who is naked.

For me, I think I'm less excited by the thought that people are looking at her, and more excited rather by the thought that she's embarrassed to be the only one naked. So while I'm not embarrassed to be naked at a nude beach... if I were to notice that no one else on the beach was fully naked, then I'd prefer to put on my trunks, while keeping my wife totally naked. She'd be the odd one out, the only one nude, it'd make her feel embarrassed, and THAT would be what gets me hot. Maybe she asks if she's allowed to put her swim suit back on and I say no.

I say this because there were times when a friend of mine would come and hang out at our house. If he would hang out late enough, sometimes he'd fall asleep on the couch. Being an especially heavy sleeper, I would sometimes have my wife disrobe in the living room, right in front of the couch. I'd teasingly play keep-away with her robe. He was asleep, and never found out that she was completely naked mere feet away from him. I didn't care that he was asleep, because it was more about her being the only one in the room who was naked, and not being able to get dressed again.

If it were up to me, she'd be naked permanently regardless of company, but that's a lofty fantasy.

[indym]

Interesting thread.

I always wonder who the labels are for, though? In my opinion... they are to comfort us and somehow insulate us from what we worry others think.

To Shihoin- I think you are taking a refined view of caudalism... and you know what? That is fine! Who cares about the label. Enjoy what you enjoy, and don't feel constrained by a label.

We've experimented more this past year and have probably mentally told ourselves several different stories. It started with sex on the balcony while on vacation. The first time we thought we were being quiet, and no one knew until we were done and heard voices. I think we both pretended to be a bit embarrassed at first. The next night, we knew people were sitting on their balconies all around us and didn't care. We didn't really talk about that at the time, specifically, but it was a turn-on for both of us. We were in Hawaii, and the sound was unmistakable

We tried a nude beach close to us several times this past summer, too. The first time we went, we both wanted to believe it was "natural" and no big deal. Yes, it is natural... but it is also sexual. Once we relaxed, it was a lot of fun for us. We both liked others taking a peek at us, and it was fun to just people watch. We saw everything from the guy trying to make sure every woman there saw him (Mr. Look at my Dick), the female equivalent (Ms. I Look Better at 20 Feet Away), and a lot of in-between people.

We had such a good time, we've been back and taken people with us. I could lie and say it was just for them to experience it, but the truth is that we both wanted to be seen (apply whatever label is needed) and to see them. I found it hot and exciting for others to look at my partner. Some tried to be sly, probably to keep their self-imposed label intact, and others were less covert about it. It was fun, regardless.

I'm not interested in sharing my partner, but I didn't mind others looking! It was fun to talk about it later and get her perspective on things. She didn't care for the guys trying to more or less hit on her. We made friends with an older couple, and she thought they were sweet. He looked just as much as the other guys, but it was fun to hear her perspective. I showed her off a little more to him, on purpose, too.

[Shihoin]

Originally Posted by visa0061

Is having your wife nude in your backyard, with just you, as exhilarating as a crowded beach, resort, pool party, etc?

If the answer is "no", you sir are a candaulist lol.

To answer that question: it's NO!! LOL!!

I see my wife naked all the time; and I'm just used to it. But when someone else sees her naked and responds to it, I see her naked "through their eyes", if that makes any sense. If it's new or interesting to them; then I "vicariously" experience their experience.

One fact that I didn't mention is that my wife has what I call a "chunky labia" (she refers to it as "lippy.") I guess a more technical term would be "labia minora hypertrophy." Even before we started going to resorts, I knew that people would notice; because I would notice it in other women. So my options were simple: either ask her to keep her legs closed (that would have been ridiculous IMHO); or simply relax and let her enjoy being naked without worrying about other people seeing her thick labia. I do recognize that "embracing it" takes it a little bit further.

I guess the same idea would apply to anyone with a really hot SO, or an SO with massive tits/ass; or whatever clearly distinguishable physical feature she might possess. There simply are women who are going to stand out in a crowd - even among other naked women. Some people are going to respond to it by staying away from the crowd, others by trying to blend in and remain unnoticed; and then some will simply accept and/or embrace being noticed. In the latter case, that's where the lines between comfort and exhibitionism; or enjoyment and caundalism can get "blurry." You see that a lot at events like the WNBR; where some naked women who "stand out" will stop and pose to be photographed naked - often as their SO watches and enjoys it.

With all that being said, this is not just a "guy thing" either. There are nudist women out there who get a kick out of other women looking at their SO's cock, for example; especially it it's the biggest one around. Things can quickly become blurry from there, if that thought triggers a stimulation for the woman. And the next thing you know, it's the woman who is "crossing that line" into caundalism.