Safe Word

[artfuldogger]

Do you and your partner have a safe word?

When you're going for it and having a full on session of passion, getting carried away, do you have a safe word to draw the line or just roll with the action?

[xxxxenophile]

Originally Posted by artfuldogger

Do you and your partner have a safe word?

When you're going for it and having a full on session of passion, getting carried away, do you have a safe word to draw the line or just roll with the action?

Given the things we get up to, and the fact that it's often with third parties whom we don't know as well, we ALWAYS have a safeword - usually two, i.e. Red to stop and Yellow to slow down/back off that action/change to something else.

It's just good practice, and common courtesy in today's world!

[nectcouple]

No...Unless you consider "No, don't do that" a kind of a safeword! We watch each other. Our bodies tell us what we need to know.

If we're with someone else? Of course we'll have a safeword.

[GRITS]

No, there is no drama code... we just talk english about whatever it is....

[cufan86]

Not so much now. But when my wife and I were first dating, then married, we did. She likes light bondage and spanking. Part of the excitement for her was resisting and saying no, stop, etc. So we had a word then. Now, we’ve been together so long that I know her boundaries and she trusts me to get to the edge, but not go over.

[jiinx81]

When I first started having sex with a new girlfriend many years ago, she didn't come the first couple of times. The third time (our first time in a bed) I knew I had her - her eyes got as big as saucers, and she kept whispering no - no - no until she came really hard. Later I asked her about it and she wasn't aware that she said that, and that I had better NOT stop fucking her just before she comes regardless of what comes out of her mouth.

[xxxxenophile]

Originally Posted by xxxxenophile

Given the things we get up to, and the fact that it's often with third parties whom we don't know as well, we ALWAYS have a safeword - usually two, i.e. Red to stop and Yellow to slow down/back off that action/change to something else.

It's just good practice, and common courtesy in today's world!

Just to clarify - it's not that we can't speak english, but if you're doing role-playing or with someone who likes to "resist" by saying no and fighting back, then a safeword is the logical way to ensure that you have consent even when the other party is calling for the cops or you to die in a fire or whatever. Not something that everyone feels the need to do or has the imagination to play around with such topics, but for those that do, and for the education of the greater populace, a safeword is now mainstream.

[GRITS]

Originally Posted by xxxxenophile

Just to clarify - it's not that we can't speak english, but if you're doing role-playing or with someone who likes to "resist" by saying no and fighting back, then a safeword is the logical way to ensure that you have consent even when the other party is calling for the cops or you to die in a fire or whatever. Not something that everyone feels the need to do or has the imagination to play around with such topics, but for those that do, and for the education of the greater populace, a safeword is now mainstream.

Then you should be able to recognize distress....if your "role play" is too deep w/ bondage & resistance , etc....you shouldn't be playing if you don't know the real situtation to react.......

But I never saw a problem in a "code" word if thats what you need...

[artfuldogger]

I disagree, GRITS.
In the throws of passion, depending on the scenario being played out, roleplay, submissive, subservient, dominant, sexual boundries, BDSM, S&M, edging, any sexual act that is pushing the normal play to another level, then there should be a word not commonly used between the agreeing parties involved.

It just makes a clear indication that the line has been drawn and to step back.

[GRITS]

Originally Posted by artfuldogger

I disagree, GRITS.
In the throws of passion, depending on the scenario being played out, roleplay, submissive, subservient, dominant, sexual boundries, BDSM, S&M, edging, any sexual act that is pushing the normal play to another level, then there should be a word not commonly used between the agreeing parties involved.

It just makes a clear indication that the line has been drawn and to step back.

Yes, i SAID there is no problem w/ a safe word if you need it......... my point was that if your playing like that,,, you "should" be able to recognize distress... otherwise maybe think about not playing that was untill you know the ropes better....