My wifes modeling career

[jdviole2]

My father was in his upper 80's when he died. In many ways though he never grew any older than fourteen or fifteen years old. Mom used to complain that he never took things seriously but that wasn't really true. When he needed to act like an adult he did so, and quite successfully. Its just that most of the time he prefered living as a teenager. His practical jokes ran to the juvenile and he loved to have fun 24/7. I inherited that from him. Helena caught it from me. We always tried to have fun whatever we were doing. When either of us was feeling down the other could always raise their spirits. Helena had a more deeply emotional response to things than I did and seemed to take the bumps of life harder because of that fact. Sometimes she needed a little more to bring her happiness back. I quickly learned that she responded well to shock tactics. The totally unexpected, if funny or shocking, could jolt her out of any mood she was in. Thankfully I was just adolescent enough to try anything to cheer her up. We were out in the front yard one day raking the leaves. It was a cold day and there weren't too many people outside but there were a few. Helena was upset about something and at one point was near tears. I called out to her. When she looked up it was to see my bare ass shining in the sunlight. She gasped so loud that she started to choke. Whatever was bothering her was forgotten as she spent the next ten minutes yelling at me for what I had done. "What if the neighbors saw you? Aren't you ashamed of yourself?" (FYI in case you are wondering the answers to her two questions were "so what" and "not in the least"). A few months later we were at the mall. Something was bothering her. Before she could get too upset I let her see me reaching to undo my belt and that is all it took. Her mind quickly switched to another track. She said that she never knew what I might do, but really I was only trying to do one thing. To make her happy again. If her worries were justified and we needed to do something about it we did. But we always did it without a panic and if there was any way to, we did it with humor. All of todays pictures showcase her in her more playful moods. The first picture is Helena responding to my grafitti while we were painting the living room in our first house in 1975. Note the name says Helen. Her legal name is Helena but she also went by Helen. (I had some other names for her too but that is for later). The second picture shows her behind bars in Silver Dollar City (a theme park in Missouri) in 1976. You can see that space between her front teeth I mentioned a couple of posts ago. The third shot shows her in a fun house type mirror in California sometime in the early 80's. Number four shows her getting even with me for my putting the moves on two wooden saloon girls. Its just my opinion here but if anyone could bring life to that wooden guy it would be her. I think this was taken at Knotts Berry farm again in the 80's. The fifth picture is the classic "OH NO I just sat on a cactus face". This was in the cactus garden at Balboa Park in 1990 probably the same day she skinny dipped the pool. You can see that gap in her teeth again. In the last shot she is attempting to prove that she is just as much a fashion model as any manequin. I think she proved her point. This was in California in the mid 80's.

[jdviole2]

The way I create these posts is to try to write out the story the night before I'm going to upload it. I do that to save daylight hours for all the other things that life requires. I already have a list of things I would like you to know about Helena, and I and only need to put them into words. Last night though I found myself having trouble writing about the topic I had chosen. The problem was what I had done during those daylight hours. I had gone to a financial advisor to have Helena's name taken off of an investment account. No big deal. I've done this four or five times already and it hasn't bothered me up to now. What happened this time was that one of the forms I had to sign had my name and marital status next to each other on the same line. This was the first time I had seen the word "widower" associated with my name and it just hit me like a hammer. Last night every time I tried to start to compose a story for all of you I would see "widower" in my mind and I would start crying. I think the new topic I selected for today will get me beyond this. Several of our friends have asked me what I miss most about Helena being gone. A little insensitive maybe this close to her passing but, hey human nature I guess. So their first guess was sleeping without her in the bed next to me. Another guess was the house was so quiet now with no one else there. There were a lot of other guesses. Nobody got it right. What I miss most is not being able to hold her hand. Everytime we left the house, where ever we went, no matter who was around we held hands. If we had to let go for any reason, as soon as we could, we reached for each other again. That simple contact was very important to both of us. That never stopped in all the years we were together. When we would have to separate for some reason I felt funny, like a part of me was missing. I feel that every day now. Like part of me is missing. Because though I can see her every day in all the pictures I have of her. Though I can hear her voice on the recorded greeting on our voice mail system. No matter how long I stand with my arm out stretched I know that I will never again feel her hand in mine. And that causes me real pain. People always say that the pain will fade. Well I'm not sure I want it to. I don't want to forget what it felt like to love someone that much and to be so loved in return. When I die I want my last conscious thought to be of Helena, I want the last thing I see in my mind to be her face, and I want the last thing I feel to be her hand taking hold of mine. Hey thanks for putting up with this. Tomorrow I will have a story of Helena, a snake, and a toilet. Should be more upbeat. The first picture today is Helena in 1991 on her 40th birthday visiting Mount Rushmore in South Dakota. I've got a funny story about her 40th but will save that for another day. The second picture was taken at the Dorothy Chandler pavillion in LA in 1978. Third we have Helena just outside the main entrance to Disneyland in California in the late 70's. Number 4 is Helena at our friends house in Denver in the early 90's. We've been hiking in the mountains for several days as you can tell by the sunburn on her face. See where her sunglasses left the skin a lot lighter. The fifth picture is at the trial gardens in the mid 70's. The last picture is also from the trial gardens. That was probably my favorite top (other than the red one she had on at the concert) that she wore. I wanted her to leave it bit more loose to allow for more movement and possible nip slips but she outvoted me. Its OK I still think it does a good job of showing her upper body off to good advantage.

[jdviole2]

Helena hated snakes. All kinds of snakes. Any snakes. She would hyperventilate and come very close to passing out when she saw a snake. Our first house was not very well caulked around the foundation and let all kinds of bugs and (yes) snakes into the interior of the house. Also the neighborhood we lived in had lots of snakes. We also had large dogs living in the houses to the right, left and behind our house. So our yard was kind of a snake refuge. We had a mating ball of garter snakes once in the back yard. A group orgy of 200 or so garter snakes writhing around in a large mass. Helena refused to come out and see and didn't even want me to take a picture of it for her. I would get panicked calls at work from time to time and when I got home I would find Helena sitting outside on the back stoop waiting for me to enter the house and corner the beast. At one time or another we had them in the kitchen, the living room, the basement, and even once under the bed. One day Helena got up and started her morning routine. Like all of us, I expect, a part of that routine involved sitting briefly on the toilet. While she was sitting there she felt something tickling her ankle. When she looked down she saw a snake crawling over her foot on the way out into the hall. By the time I got home she had calmed down and the snake was gone. She couldn't tell me how she got rid of the snake. Everytime she started the story she would relive the panic and couldn't continue. This is one time where humor did nothing to help. (I told her that if you had to encounter something that scared the crap out of you sitting on the toilet was the best place to be) She didn't find me funny at all. Years later we went to California and I wanted to visit a reptile farm they had there. Supposedly they had the worlds largest crocodile. I don't know if that was true but it was a big one. The had all sorts of other reptiles including, of course, tons of snakes. All of them were in glass aquariums. Helena fought against her fears and finally was able to get close to examine all the snakes without panic setting in. She was looking at the King Cobra they had and was disappointed. She expected to see the movie version with the hood flaring out. Instead the snake was relaxed and just looked like a regular snake. By now she was pressing her nose against the glass to really get a good look. Now I swear I was just trying to help her get a good view. I knocked on the side of the aquarium. In less than a second the cobra raised up about a foot and a half, flared out its hood (real movie snake style) and lunged at Helena's nose. She levitated a good meter off the ground and instantly lost both the ability to breath and the power of speach. She recovered quickly though, mainly so she could give me holy hell for what I had done. I tried to explain that I just wanted her to fully experience the "wildlife fun". I could have saved my breath. The excuse meant nothing to her, I don't even think she heard me. She yelled at me for a good ten minutes, and I may be wrong but I don't think she even took a breath in that time. I was eventually forgiven but the incident was never forgotten. The first picture for today is Helena on our first trip to California in 1975 coming back up the stairs from the beach, where she had encountered her first nude sunbather. The next shot is from 1979 and another trip to California and another beach. Next is a slightly blurry clothed picture from one of her nude sessions in early 1974. Next we have a shot from the Worlds Fair, I think this was in New Orleans in 1986. The next picture is Helena running across a medow in Germany in 1974. This was about a month after we were married when she and her mom came over to visit some relatives and I went up to Munich to meet her and bring her back to Naples with me. The last shot is another of Helena and the hat. This is from 1975.

[jdviole2]

The incident that I mentioned in the "sex" post that happened to Helena when she was a kid made it very hard for her to trust people. Everyone in the past who she told the story to had betrayed her trust in them. She had retreated into herself as far as revealing anything about her past went. Yet she told me on only our second date. When I asked her to marry me I was due to get out of the navy in a year and had absoulutly no idea of what I was going to do or how I was going to make money to support us. That never worried her. She placed all her trust in me. She knew, somehow, that I would figure it out. My first entry level job really didn't pay very much. I told her that if she thought it would be enough she could quit her job and stay home to take care of the house. She quit immediately. She told me later that she wasn't worried. That she knew I would soon be making a great deal more money than when I when I started out. She had unending faith in me. As a part of my job I occasionally had to leave in the middle of the night to meet some of the women I worked with to resolve problems. When that happened I might not be home for hours (once I didn't get home for two days). She never had any suspicions that I was fooling around on her. She trusted me. When we would be out somewhere she would call my attention to good looking, or scantily clad women just in case I might have missed seeing them. She knew I would never leave her. I repayed that trust every chance I got. For example. Helena loved to dance. I, on the other hand, would rather have my feet chopped off at the ankles rather than have to dance. Our friend, who lived across the street, had recently been divorced. A couple of times a month she and Helena would go out and hit all the clubs and bars that had dancing. Our friend was looking for a hookup. Helena was looking to dance. She would have a drink or two but never once came home drunk, and never was out very late. I have always been a late night kind of person so I would be up when she got home. We would talk about the guys she danced with. She even had some regular guys that she danced with a lot. She always wore her wedding ring and let them know up front that dancing was all they would get from her. No one ever tried anything. If she really liked them well enough they might get a kiss on the cheek when the dance was over. In fact the only conversation we ever had on the topic of other men and other women was when she told me that if I ever had an affair it had better not be with any woman she knew. I wanted to ask if that meant that it was OK for me to have an affair as long as she didn't know the woman. I didn't ask for two reasons. 1) I was too much in love with Helena to even be able to imagine being with another woman. And 2) I was afraid she meant that if she didn't know the woman then there would only be me to deal with. If she knew the woman, then there would be two bodies to dispose of. For us Love, Honor, and Cherish were not just words in the wedding vow. It was the way we lived life. More than one person has asked me if I was going to get married again. I answerd all of them that if you were used to perfection why would you go for anything less. For me, there will never be a person who will be as vital a part of my happiness as Helena. The first picture shows Helena in the town of Munt Germany (near Munich) in 1974. She had gone to get her hair done. As usual she is dressed in a really short skirt. Number two is Helena having a free beer at Busch Gardens in California in the mid 70's. You used to be able to tour the brewery and then get some beer in the attached beer garden. They also had a huge garden area with tons of exotic birds. I don't think they are open anymore. The third shot was one that Helena hated. She always thought her butt was too big and really hated it when she saw I had taken a picture with her ass as the point of interest. Taken somewhere in Arizona in the late 70's. One of my favorites. Number four is in Colorado in the early 80's. Notice that she is wearing a pack. When we hiked in the mountains we both wore packs. We took water, rain gear, rope, first aid stuff, matches, anything we might need in an emergency. In addition I had a buffalo skinner knife on my belt. In a pinch it would cut down small bushes or even trees. Picture number 5 is Helena in her Captain Morgan stance. This was taken in the Petrified Forest in Arizona in the late 70's. The last shot Helena is resting in a garden. Not sure where or when this was taken. It kind of looks like the tower at the Grand Canyon. If it is then it would also be in the late 70's.

[jdviole2]

Just a short story today. If you had Helena for a friend then you really didn't need anyone else. As an animal lover at one time we had five different neighbors that would regularily give us their house keys so we could take care of their dogs and cats while they vacationed. Helena did most of the work during the day and then would go over at night with me to finish up for the day. She loved caring for the animals. She also took in the mail for the people so they didn't have to stop having it delivered. But the best example I can give you of Helena as a friend involves the woman that moved in to the house behind ours. She worked for the same company I did but not in the same division. We were back fence neighbors, if you know what I mean. We talked whenever we were both out working but never visited back and forth. We were busy and the woman had her mother living with her. A few years after she moved in the mother's health started to fail. One day when we were both out working the woman mentioned to Helena that she was getting worried because her mother would insist that she was eating lunch but when the woman came home the food was still in the refridgerator. She didn't want to have to put her mom in a home but she was getting just bad enough that she was worried about her mom not getting the right nutrition. Helena asked her if she could come over and make sure her mom ate. The woman was very surprised. She told Helena that it would be every work day. Helena told her that wouldn't be a problem. She could come over to make lunch and then would sit with her mom while she ate. The two of them could then watch a couple of soap operas. Helena said that way her mom could have company for a couple of hours a day. Our neighbor started to ask Helena how much she would charge her for that. Helena stopped that conversation quickly. There would be no charge. The woman didn't know what to say. Helena told just to say yes. Helena did that for about 18 months until the woman retired and moved away. We talked it over between the two of us a couple of times. Helena told me you didn't charge friends for favors. Period. That was my girl. Pictures for today. The first is another "butt" shot. It shows Helena at the top of a ladder on the way to Corona Arch in Utah. The next shot is a different shot of Helena in a formal garden. Third shot is Helena holding up a rock so I can hike under it. Next shot is Helena resting. Seems like we have a lot of shots of her resting but when you are hiking that is about the only time you have for photos. The fifth shot is Helena petting a rather large stone dog. Don't know where or when this was taken. The last is one taken in my parents back yard.

[jdviole2]

When we first got married the subject of children never came up. Frankly we were having too much fun with just the two of us. After a few years we did talk about kids but sort of left things that if either of us really felt the need we would let the other know. Finally Helena sat down with me one day and said she thought we should have a baby. For the next two years we exhaustively pursued conception. (sex is great but not time critical sex, it ends up being work) It never happened. Whether it was me or her we never knew. Nor did we want to find out. Friends asked later why we didn't go to a fertility clinic or pursue adoption. For both of us, in all of life, if things were meant to happen then they would. For us, kids never did happen. In 1994 after she had the second bleeding into her brain her neurosurgeon told me that it was a good thing she never got pregnant, since the experience would very likely have killed her. Helena would have been a great mother. Though she would argue that with me, if she could, I've seen her around kids and she was amazing. Not so much in the later years after her health began to fail but in the early years. Not that we did totally without the experience of kids. Two sets of friends of ours would "lend" us their kids from time to time. At one time or another we took pairs of kids to amusement parks, movies, weekend trips, etc. We were godparents to one of the kids first born son. We got invited to family birthdays, Christmas celebrations, etc. Since we didn't have any kids we were pretty free to vacation when we wanted. I guess we were selfish in that way. People have also commented that it is too bad we never had children so I could have had help with Helena's care. When I look at other people though it seems like a lot of the time the kids don't live close to their parents anymore anyway. Of course in some cases the kids don't even speak to their parents anymore. All in all we were both OK with how life treated us as far as children were concerned. At least with the 4 "kids" we had (by proxy) Helena will be remembered. For myself I really don't care. When I go if the next day no one remembers I was here I'm OK with that. But I feel it would have been a tragedy if my Helena was not remembered by someone. OK on to the pictures. The first one is that High School graduation picture I mentioned before. Not a good picture of her at all it was taken in 1971. The second is another one taken by her dad. I find it very sexy. From 1972. Number three is from the late 70's in Colorado. She was dedicated to taking pictures. He approached it the way she did everything she loved. She put her all into it. Number 4 is at the trial garden. The man is her father. The next picture is from the mid 80's. This is at Blue Lake in Colorado. Her favorite place to hike. Had she wanted cremation this was where I planned to scatter her ashes. (Against the law but screw 'em). The snow she is standing on contains some lichens that turn the snow a dark pink when you disturb the surface. The last one is another of 4 shots I took at the same time. This is NOT the same one I posted before.

[jdviole2]

This is a story about Helena's close exposure to the seamy side of life. During those first three weeks when we were getting to know each other Helena asked a million questions about Naples. I told her everything I thought would interest her. All the things to see and do. It wasn't enough. I don't know who she had been talking to but she wanted to know everything about the parts of Naples where nice american girls didn't go. She wanted all the dirt on the bars, the con men, and the hookers. All the people a navy man would meet on a night out. Naples is not that much different from most "navy" towns. The area around the fleet landing is filled with bars, dealers, hookers and other oportunities for sailors to lose what little money they had. I told her about the "hey Joes", those are the guys that will sell you authentic 1000 dollar watches for twenty bucks. Watches that stop running in a couple of days. I told her about the bars and the "B" girls that work there getting guys to pay for champagne (and get served ginger ale). I told her about all the different people that come out at night. And I told her about the hookers. Now I was homeported there. We were permanently stationed on a ship in the harbor for 3 and a half years. So we got to know the people of the night and they got to know us. I told Helena all the dirty secrets I had, and I had quite a few of all types. Lets just say I was no alter boy. She told me that when we were married all that would stop. (That was not a question it was an empahatic statement). I assured her it would. She then told me that until we got married she wouldn't ask what I had done and would trust me to take precautions against disease or whatever. A truly amazing woman. And to answer your question, NO I did not continue my wild ways after we got engaged. I saved myself for marriage. So corny. So we get married. Two months later she comes over with her mom to visit the German relatives. Then she comes down to Naples to stay with me for three weeks. We saw all the sights (there and in Rome), ate lots of good Italian food, and had a lot of fun. She spoke no Italian but every day while I was at work she would go out and see parts of the town. (She became addicted to Gelato, Italian Ice Cream and had a special store she went to almost every day). After about two weeks we were talking about all we had done and seen. I asked her if we had missed anything. You guessed it. She wanted to see the night life around fleet landing. I had only been married a few months but already could recognize when I was going to lose an argument. So that night we hit the town. I took her to the bar I used to frequent. We had only been there a few minutes when there was a police raid. The bar girls grabbed Helena and I and took us into their dressing area in a back room. (I used to enjoy this privilege myself) The italian police never checked the back room. Helena was fascinated. The lights in the room were very bright and you could see just how old these "girls" were. The bar lights are so dim that they all look pretty young. However I know that one of them that I sat with occasionally, was in her mid fifties. Then she wanted to see the hookers. They don't frequent the main streets but fill the alleys. (Many of them are housewifes that hook at night, taking their customers into the family bed while the husband, parents, and kids sit in the next room with only a curtain between) Some of the girls recognized me and were suspicious of Helena, thinking she was someone trying to muscle in on their business. (She was dressed, as always, in a very short skirt) I introduced her and explained who she was. They welcomed her as one of their own. We spent about half an hour talking with one group (of course they all spoke English). While we were there Helena was asked by three marines how much she would charge for all three. (She really got a kick out of that). Then just before we went back to the hotel, she asked me if there were any good looking hookers in Naples. (most of the girls/women were OK but not what you would call beautiful). So I took her a couple of blocks further away from fleet landing and up a different alley. Here the hookers are spectacular looking. Elegantly dressed. When they saw we were together they didn't bother us and we just walked the alley and then headed back to the hotel. As we were taking the funicular railway back up the hill Helena asked me, very puzzled, why none of those girls talked to us. And finally asked me flat out if I had ever been with one of them. I told her no and it was a good thing for her. She asked why. I finally told her it was because the girls weren't, girls. I had taken her up the alley with the transvestite hookers. She really impressed me that night. She took the whole experience so calmly. She had a good time. She bravely walked the streets and alleys and never showed any signs of nervousness. She joined in conversation with the hookers like she was "one of the girls". For a girl from the midwest she showed a sophistication I would never have expected. A few weeks after Helena returned to the states, I was back at "my" bar. The bartender was telling me that the girls had talked about how much they liked my wife and that they hoped she would come back to visit again sometime. She never forgot that night and would talk about it frequently. Todays first picture is Helena in front of Mann's Chinese in Hollywood. She was there to measure her hands against those of the stars. The second is another "resting on the trail" shot from Colorado from the 70's or 80's. Third is Helena exiting a prehistoric cliff dwelling in Arizona in the late 70's. The fourth picture shows Helena coming up from the Bandera Volcano Ice Cave. Bandera is a privately owned volcano in New Mexico. Under the volcano is a cave filled with ice the year around. This was in 1979. The next picture shows Helena at our friends house in Denver playing with one of the family cats. Probably around the mid 80's. The last shot is from the mid 70's but I don't remember where it was taken.

[jdviole2]

Helena always told friends that I had corrupted her. It is true, I guess. When we met she had not been exposed to the range of things that I had. I suppose that is what led her to ask all the questions about Naples and its seedy side. Her language was that of a lady. She might give out with a hell or damn but nothing more exotic than that. Terms she might use about sex were no worse than you might have heard anywhere. Periodically, more in the earlier years less in the later years as her knowledge grew, I would use a word or phrase that she did not know. She would demand an explanation. In the explanation I also included data on when not to use the word/phrase. I used my mom as my litmus paper. I would tell Helena that this one she should not use in front of my mother. In a very short while she grew very adept at "reading the room". She could tell in just a few minutes what kind of language would be acceptable and what wouldn't. It was funny to watch. She wouldn't say much at first then would gradually begin to join the conversation. I loved watching that. In a certain group of people you would swear that she was born and raised in a convent. Not even a damn or hell would come out. In the right crowd, however, you might swear that she had been a prostitute. She could use all the right words and phrases, and in the correct context. She was right. I had corrupted her. I'm not bragging about that. Not my greatest accomplishment. It did make her better able to navigate the world though. And know what was going on. I remember a party and two of the women were talking about the husband of a third. Apparently he and his wife performed some kind of sex act and the story teller couldn't remember the right name. Helena came to the rescue and provided the correct term and then rejoined her conversaton about quilting. The two women were speechless. With her face people underestimated what she could do or could and would say. I miss hearing her voice. Hey, I still had lots of words to teach her. On to the pictures for today. The first picture is at the Little Bo Peep gift shop that used to be in Branson Missouri. I am showing this because Helena did the design of the lamb and the original drawing that the owner used as the LOGO for her business. This was a freebie since the owner was a friend of Helena's mother. The second shows Helena in front of the LA Museum of Art. We wanted to see the King Tut exhibit I had seen in London but we couldn't get tickets. This was in, I think, 1976. The third is Helena in another shot similar to some I have posted before. In the next picture she is in a garden area but I don't remember where. It was also in the late 70's. The next one is Helena dwarfed by a desert plant. This was in the late 70's in Joshua Tree Natural Park, in California. The last picture is Helena in California in the early 80's. I do not remember exactly where.

[ewokalypse]

It's a little odd to say on a site of this nature, but this whole thread is one of the sweetest things I've ever read. I'm very sorry for your loss, jdviole2; you seem to have had a wonderful life together.

[jdviole2]

Helena and I didn't do much in the way of outdoor activities at home. No softball, golf, tennis, etc. But one year she thought it might be fun to ride bicycles around town. So we bought some decent bikes and away we went. We tried to ride some every few days in the good months. We mostly rode on the streets but that was kind of hard because the streets with little traffic were in a very hilly part of town. Riding up and down seemed like too much fun. Then our town built a few bike paths and we started riding them. We had a lot of fun. One of the paths was about a 10 mile trail. We made our goal to ride the length of the trail and then return a 20 mile round trip. We were ready, so off we went. The day was warm, sunny, with a stiff breeze to keep us cool. We made the first ten miles in great shape. Made really good time. Then we started back. Thats when the trouble began. Remember that stiff breeze I mentioned. We had made good time on the way out because it was at our back. The ride home was into the wind the entire way. It took us three times as long to ride back as it did to ride out. About half way back I told Helena that she should stay where she was and I would ride the rest of the way back and get the car to come pick her and the bike up. She refused. She said we started together and would finish together (or be finished together). We got back and I do not remember being that tired ever before or since. We kept to short rides after that. She was a great sport though. Had our places been reversed I might have sat it out and waited until she brought the car. Oh as a funny side story related to this. One of the reasons we were biking was we were trying to lose weight. Helena had read somewhere that you should take pictures of yourself nude or at least in underwear and save them. Then while dieting if you began to weaken you looked at the pictures and supposedly got your willpower back. We took the pictures (in underwear, neither of us wanted to see ourselves that overweight, naked) and put them in a dresser drawer. And promptly forgot they were there. Flash forward 10 years. We were looking for something, don't remember what, and were searching the entire house. I dumped out a dresser drawer and found the envelope with the pictures. When I saw what they were I started laughing and Helena came to see what the heck was so funny. She started laughing just as much as me. The joke was the pictures looked so GOOD. Over the intervening years we had gained a bit more weight and our old selves looked pretty thin by comparison. I still have the pictures but I don't plan to post Helena's underwear shot. It just wouldn't be fair. We had some friends we used to visit in a town not far from ours. They had two young boys and one year their dad built a Go-Kart for them. That year when we visited he asked us if we wanted to go out and try out the cart. Hell yes! There was an abandoned mall nearby and we went to use their vacant parking lot. The kart was a custom built job and had a wider than normal wheel base. It was built low enough to the ground that you could corner very fast and not worry about rolling over. It was an open kart, no roll cage. It was also fast. It could go about 75 mile per hour (over 120 KPH). I had my ride and it was a lot of fun. Full gas then hit the brakes go into the turn and open her up again. Just great. Then it was Helena's turn. We didn't have any helmets (the owner didn't believe in them) and no other safety gear. Helena climbed into the kart and was ready to go. Our friend explained to her again about the gas, braking for the turn, all she needed to know. He could have saved his breath. He said go. Helena punched it and kept her foot on the floor the entire ride. As she approached the end of the parking lot I kept expecting her to brake for the turn. She had other ideas. When she got near the end she whipped the wheel into the turn. She drifted the turn and at just the right time straightened out for the back stretch run. Full Speed 70 plus mile per down the lot drifted the turn at the other end and again straightened out at exactly the right time. As she passed by where we were standing you could not hear the engine anymore because her shrieking yells drowned out the sound. Her long hair standing straight out behind her. She had a fierce look of manic glee on her face. I think, that day, I finally understood the Norse myth of the Valkyries. With the sounds she was making and the look on her face all she needed was shimmering armour and she would have been the personification of the warrior woman riding down to escort the dead heros to Valhalla. I had never seen that side of her before, and really I never saw it again. On the way home she was quiet a lot of the time (we were pretty tired) but she never lost the huge grin on her face. I wanted to get her a kart but knew that where we lived she would never have been able to ride at the speed or with the freedom that she had that first time, and I think that would have cheapened the whole experience for her. As it was that was one of her fondest memories. As her health got worse and she wasn't able to do what she used to do she would get a bit depressed. But if I started talking about the Go-Kart, her eyes would lose focus and she would start to smile and I knew she was behind the wheel again. It never failed to lift her up. Todays pictures are all from prints. The first one is Helena in the mid 70's at the entrance to the amusement pier at Santa Monica. The first building on the left is the famous carousel. The exterior is seen in The Sting. The second shot is from a very faded print. It shows Helena on the front porch of our first house (The House of Snakes) at around the time she shot her nudes. You can just see some gaps in the calking at the base of the siding. The next picture is from the late 70's and shows Helena in one of the many hotel rooms we've stayed at on our trips. It is funny but looking at all these pictures again I notice how nicely dressed she tried to be when we went out. (I always figure that, for me, if all the naughty bits are covered that's good enough). The next picture is from Easter time of 1975. We were still living at her parents house at the time and she and her mom had made a Lamb shaped cake for Easter dinner. Helena has almost finished decorating it. The next shot is from later in 1975 after we moved into our first house. This is another "clothed" picture from the nude shoots. The last picture is from the mid 80's and was taken at our friends house in Denver. Helena is involved in one of her favorite activities, playing with cats. She loved them and they loved her.