I love you, funny face!

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. When you come home and find your wife like this at 7:45 pm...it's time to give her a long break from the kids and housework.
2. The irony is, she married the ruthless entrepreneur with the idea that he would be a good provider...and she'd lead a comfortable life.
3. His girlfriend's lost panties in his wife's hand...this was the last thing Steve remembered seeing before he woke up in the hospital.
4. "But Laura! They didn't HAVE virgin sacrifices during the Renaissance!" (Another Renaissance Faire participant who doesn't want to die)
5. Uh oh...she just realized you haven't been staring at her cell phone.
6. Sandy was so pleased! Joe had never shown any interest at all in her dog before...and now he was taking pictures! (Uh huh...)
7. Don't laugh guys...if that thing was splitting YOU open, you'd have the same painfully dismayed look on YOUR face.
8. The Dollar Shave Club has a pretty good thing going...but the Lesbian Shave Club has more TRULY satisfied customers.
9. I've been in a LOT of shopping malls in my lifetime and I've never seen anything so inviting. Have you?
10. During Prohibition, the sweet and pure Anderson sisters grew so sick and tired of listening to their preacher father's sermons about sex and alcohol...that they finally, as a team, decided to get drunk and get laid. (Great news for the Johnson brothers)

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. There's nothing like the joy of a kid in a toy store!
2. "And when I'm through fucking your brains out, Ms. Rothstein, we can talk about that Insurance policy again." (Don sold a lot of what he called 'No Brainer insurance' policies to bored housewives. Did women need insurance AND a good fuck? No brainer.)
3. Sexy? Yes, but when she sits up...the photographer is going to be sorry they used a full bottle. That's his favorite chair.
4. This poor young woman is being devoured by pool piranhas, and all you can do is stare at her nipples! What kind of person are you?
5. Here was John's proof that he shouldn't leave his wife alone with the handsome young dry waller.
6. Clearly, Cecile was trying wordlessly to ask Nick for something she needed him to do...SOMETHING important...but what could it be?
7. For Jimmy the choice was difficult. Play with his favorite Tonka dumptruck...or the new and very strange nanny.
8. The photographer's well trained dogs are highly skilled at getting women to bend down while all their bras are all still hanging out to dry.
9. "Wwhoooa...weee're...daaaancinnng...innn...sloooow ...mooootion!"
10. "Pssst! Don't tell your boyfriend...but how'd you like me to chew the sand out of those curly little pubic hairs of your's?" ( It should come as no surprise that lesbians use bad pickup lines too)

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. You should have known she wasn't going to enjoy giving you a handjob while you look at videos of your ex wife!
2. Mr. Upskirt Photo Sneaker...you are busted!
3. Moonbeam Smith will tell you that her "Dance of Growth" is good for her plants. The fact she does it topless is good for us.
4. You get Mardi Gras beads for showing your tits. For having your pussy photographed, you get to appear on Internet porn sites!
5. Our historic first photographs from the new "OCC Tick Cam." (Voyeurs will stop at nothing.)
6. "Jenny...I think we killed it."
7. The new "Chastity Thong" works a lot like a mousetrap. Ouch!
8. Would you like a coconut...or two juicy melons?
9. If this is the reaction YOU get on a nude beach...it's time to put your pants back on.
10. Not only does it give her orgasms, Heidi likes John's cock because it's an excellent gum cleaner.

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. This is Mandy. She gives me wood. (What?)
2. This is not wood. I don't know what this is.
3. Meaty Milfs make marvelous meals for marine monsters.
4. Sleeping Sara screamed as she dreamed of being reamed.
5. Ah...the infamous "Building X." Where the federal government has been conducting top secret experiments involving exhibitionists.
6. Some girls are more excited about the prom than others.
7. When Natalie the masseuse runs out of massage oil, she can usually improvise - especially if her client gets her excited.
8. When Jane came home and found her housemate sniffing her underwear, she made arrangements to move out immediately...
9. ...but her new housemates wouldn't stay out of her lingerie drawer either! Poor Jane.
10. The three friends went out, together and topless, to face the fury of the coming storm. They would uphold their vows to defend precious summer until the bitter end.

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. Her dad always said that Tina was out to impress every young buck who came along. I guess he was right.
2. "Pierre...I'm downtown. I've forgotten to wear a slip with my skirt... and a strange man with a camera is following me! Please bring me a slip or a pair of pants before this man takes a picture of me that ends up on the Internet! Hurry Pierre! Hurry!" (Pierre was too late)
3. The tampon marketing folks encouraged an active lifestyle, but made no promises about swimming in shark infested waters.
4. "I have some very bad news for you, my pretty. Batman is just Ben Afleck in a very corny rubber suit."
5. The folks at Kymco wish it to be known that riding their ATVs in an unsafe manner could result in serious injury or death.
6. On a business trip, Ann brought a dildo and visual stimulation, hoping to give this new "masturbation thing" she'd heard about a try.
7. Weird Science
8. "What? He brought two buck chuck to our honeymoon picnic on the beach? That cheap bastard!"
9. This just in...A wilflife camera has finally captured a clear shot of the person who's been stealing our sunbleached snail shells!
10. She'd been holding it for the whole damned riot. Finally, she got some relief...and, unfortunately, Internet imortality.

[wildfire54]

Happening in neighborhood near you.

1.Try as he might. Zoe's Dermatologist couldn't identify her skin condition.

2.Having accidentally left her dildo at home.Cheryl buys a suitable substitute.

3. Even his friends told him that Phillip was taking the term 'trophy wife' far to literally.

4.Brenda finally found out that things do go better with Coke.

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. Here we see the Five Shade Horny female preening in an attempt to find a suitable lover...
2. It takes her no time at all to attract the attention of a Four Bra Hickey Giver.
3. Notice the Yellow Chested Pantsless Brunette sniffing the pantyhose of a rival...
4. She then marks the hose with her own scent as a way to assert her territory.
5. In the highlands, where the trails fork, two young hikers perform the rarely seen "Bench Dance"
6. Note their remarkable synchronicity and incredible balance.
7. It is a very tiring ritual.
8. And speaking of rituals...The Slumber Party Mounting Ritual is a way for young women to act out sexual fantasies...with clothes on.
9. "Damn...now you know all of our secrets!"

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. She looks rather fetching. He IS fetching.
2. This May/December romance works because after plucking hers...she has eyebrow envy.
3. Martha remembered everything on her list of things that she wanted to bring to the beach...except her kids...
4. ...who went next door and surprised Ms. Softbottom, who was preparing to do some nude sunbathing in her backyard.
5. "Ow! I stepped on something squishy and it stung my foot..."
6. "Does this look like the culprit? Do you want for me to eat him? Do ya? Huh?" ( Cindy needs to eat more before she leaves the house)
7. "My last lover was hung like a freakin' whale!" (Mary loved to constantly remind her husband of her amorous past)
8. Another shot for the old "Girls Showing Starfish" thread. (Ah...OCC Nostalgia!)
9. "Whoah! Damn...who put a dildo on my chair?" (Never walk around nude with a prankster in the house.)
10. OK..THAT'S TWO POSTS IN ONE DAY. I HOPE YOU'RE PACIFIED!

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. Sometimes women become nudists because they just can't figure out how clothing works! Doh!
2. Suzy gets awfully excited when she finds a good deal on bologna.
3. Here's Sheila, next to a log, writing IN her log. Oh...and her boyfriend just happens to be a logger.
4. "Now HERE we see why this place needs a bigger women's restroom!"
5. Ladies, if you choose not to swallow, semen makes an outstanding dishwashing aid.
6. "I am NOT a parrot! Now you come over here and get on your knees to apologize, tourista!" ( Carnival dancers were very edgy this year)
7. The table is set and the spread has been laid out. Anyone hungry?
8. This is what happens when you lock yourself out while nude sunbathing...fortunately hubby didn't work too terribly late.
9. "I'm a seagull! I'm a seagull! I'm going to eat garbage and shit all over the pier!"
10. Which reminds me...what sort of pictures do you suppose Alfred Hitchcock jerked off to?

[Ghost In Oblivion]

1. Now this is probably the greatest event this old dude has witnessed in thirty years...do we want to spoil it for him by making a joke of it?
2. No "Stairway to Heaven!"
3. This picture could have become the greatest military recruitment poster of all time...but it here it languishes in the Funny Face thread!
4. Another victory for the invincible mechanical bull...and a nice partial beaver shot for us!
5. Most women inevitably face this moment of truth. It can certainly be a life altering decision...To suck...or not to suck?
6. Women who sleep with hairy men...(sigh)
7. There has to be an easier way to get a free ride with Amtrak.
8. There has to be an easier way to avoid a ticket for an expired parking meter.
9. Aliens from Venus are among us! The good news is... they come in peace. The bad news is... half of them smoke.
10. One of the wisest observations of all time? Who was it that said that men start their lives fighting to get out of here...and spend the rest of their lives trying to get back in?