I Love Pregnant

[wolf061966]

I hope it`s not a repost

[wolf061966]

I hope it`s not a repost

[Dutchman1972]

Lovely ladies with their bumps!

[kayser05]

the last one is gorgeous thanks

[osreb]

1. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school clothes.

2. An alarm clock is a device for waking people up, who don't have small kids.

3. Any child can tell you that the sole purpose of a middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

4. Anyone who says "Easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried it.

5. Children are natural mimics who act like their parents, despite every effort to teach them good manners.

6. Children don't sleep ... They recharge.

7. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

8. Cleaning your house while your kids are at home is like trying to shovel the driveway during a snowstorm.

9. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your kids.

10. Gym clothes left at school in lockers mildew at a faster rate than other clothing.

11. If raising children was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

12. Kids really brighten a household. They never turn off any lights.

13. Leakproof thermoses - will.

14. Refrigerated items, used daily, will gravitate toward the back of the refrigerator.

15. Shouting to make your kids obey is like using the horn to steer your car and you get about the same results!

16. Sick children recover miraculously when the doctor enters the treatment room.

17. Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto a freeway.

18. The item your child lost, and must have for school within the next ten seconds, will be found in the last place you look.

19. The chances of a piece of bread falling with the g**** jelly side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

20. The garbage truck will be two doors past your house when the argument over "whose day it is to take out the trash" ends.

21. The main purpose of holding children's parties is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.

22. The shirt your child must wear today will be the only one that needs to be washed or mended.

23. The tennis shoes you must replace today will go on sale next week.

24. There are only two things a child will share willingly - communicable diseases and their mother's age.

25. Trying to dress an active little one is like trying to thread a sewing machine while it's running.

26. We childproofed our home three years ago and they're still getting in!

27. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then, you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

28. Your chances of being seen by someone you know dramatically increase if you drive your child to school in your robe and curlers.

29. Your children may leave home, but their stuff will be in your attic and basement forever.

[redguard]

Here's to you!

[osreb]

1. She was in the bathroom, putting on her makeup, under the watchful eyes of her young granddaughter, as she'd done many times before. After she applied her lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Gramma, you
forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye...

2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 62. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"

3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild
raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied.

6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read.."

7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these, yourself!"

8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."

9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "mine says I'm 4 to 6."

10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said, "how do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the
girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant
means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. 'It means carrying a child."

12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one child. "No," said another. "He's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close". They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."

13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. "Oh," he said, "she lives at the airport, and when we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport."

14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him!

15. My Grandparents are funny, when they bend over; you hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog.

[osreb]

A man and his wife were making their first doctor visit prior to the birth of their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife's stomach with indelible ink.
The couple was curious about what the stamp was for, so when they got home, the husband dug out his magnifying glass to try to see what it was. In very tiny letters, the stamp said, "When you can read this, come back and see me."

~~~~~

When choosing a name for your baby, go to the back door and shout it out a few times.

~~~~~

[Vernon]

Just love these curvy ladies.... feminine beauty!

[flipcpl]

anyone remember these?




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