[MacNfries]

I always love stopping by this thread to read the jokes ... thanks to those who manage it. Thought I would contribute one of my own. This one is best told in person, doing the acting of the preacher:

The Tent Revival (scene) A sawdust, tent revival somewhere in the deep, South, on a hot, summer night.

The old, country preacher had been preaching God's word for over an hour, as his congregation sat on foldup chairs, using their church bulletins to fan and cool themselves of the hot, summer night. It was nearing the end of the service, and it was time for the old country preacher to call God's sinners to the front to get their salvation and redemption. In the background, the old pump organ played "The Old Rugged Cross".

"Oh Lord, I know there are sinners tonight that need saving ... that need that heavy burden lifted ... let them come and lay their sins at the foot of the alter tonight."
(no one in the congreation left their seat, and the preacherman loosened his tie)

"Oh Lord, speak to their hearts tonight. Let them know that salvation and forgiveness is their only way through the gates of heaven. Bring 'em on, yes, bring 'em on to Jesus"
(still noone stirred in the congregation, and beads of swet appeared on the preachers forehead)

"Oh Lord, save thes sinners amongst us ... stir their sinful hearts, o'Lord ... come down and repent their sins ... and tell it all to Jesus".
(still noone moved, and the preacher took off his coat and rolled up his sleeves)

"Oh Heavenly Father, talk to their hearts. Lift them from their seats, and help them find peace in their hearts and salvation tonight ... in the name of our Father, tell it all to Jesus"

Suddenly, from the back of the tent, come a tall, skinny country boy, head bowed, crying, and dragging his feet through the sawdust ... he fell to his knees, at the feet of the preacherman, saying ... "Ohhhh preacher, I am such a terrible sinner. My heart is so heavy with these burdends ... I lied to my wife and went to a strip club to lust at naked women ... and I cheated my business partner out of $1,000 ... "

The preacherman put his left hand on the boy's head, lifted up his right hand to the heavens, and yelled out "YES, son, tell it all to Jesus, tell it ALL to Jesus" ...

The country boy continued ... "and preacher, 2 nights ago I went to the barn and had sex with one of the sheep, and ... "

The preacherman jumped back, wide eyed, rolled down his sleeves, put his coat back on, tightened up his tie, and wiped his forehead, then leaned over to the country boy and whispered ... "damn, son, I don't think I'd of told that one if I was you!"