Sorry to hear you got left out. With the first story, those things just happen sometimes BUT you should ask your wife to think of you first and be proactive in those situations. She could have asked everyone to wait until you got back or could have jumped back in with you (and told/fibbed to everyone you had never been skinny dipping and that they all had to come).
With situations like in the second instance, before they finish what they are saying, you have to get all your clothes off. Then they can act like adults or they can go change in the super-small hotel bathroom.
Better to create these situations rather than hope to fall into one, in my opinion.
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