[wayne]

In 1976 I was looking for a job and the Navy was hiring.

I ended up on the USS PLUCK, MSO 464. The Pluck, and the other minesweepers of that class, were wooden hulled boats commissioned during the Korean War. The Pluck was actually older than I was and it was a terror in anything like a heavy sea. It was home ported in San Diego, so the liberty was good; I can’t actually complain.

I made rank pretty quickly and became the first enlisted man to stand Command Duty Officer, in port. That meant that while the Captain was away, I was the boss. It was fun.
I had to run a damage control drill every night but I had fun with it; did stuff that was out of the ordinary.

One night I was sitting in the Ward Room, watching television, and got called to the quarterdeck over a phone call. It was Tina.

She was married to some farmer from North Dakota and was way bored. A couple of weeks later I took a few days of leave, drove to Phoenix, and took them both to dinner.

One thing led to another. I knocked her up, she got divorced, I left the Navy and started going to Arizona State, we had a daughter, then we got married.

Tina is a natural exhibitionist. About the first thing I did was to mow down the forest and she kept it that way for several years. She started, kinda on accident; to let my dad see her naked. I was pretty good with that, my dad was a sweet old guy and deserved a break
… Then we advanced to a local nudist place on the weekends. She used to lay out in the sun, on her tummy, with her cheeks pulled open so all the world could see her ass hole.
She was really into that, and who was I to complain?

Then it started to become a problem. One day, in the spring, I was on the roof putting new cooler pads into the cooler. She got naked, put on one of my white shirts, left it unbuttoned, and climbed up the ladder to the roof. So there she stood, naked, on the fucking roof … in my shirt, so that all the neighbors could see her.

Honestly, I am a pretty liberal guy where stuff like that is concerned, but that one freaked me out. We had done the “go to dinner without panties” thing a few times; we went to a Cardinal’s game once when they were playing San Diego in pre-season and she left her underpants at home … but it was fucking hot in that stadium that I don’t think anyone actually noticed. She was about 6 months pregnant.

One day she decided to do the laundry at a local Laundromat, which was a touch stupid because we had a washer and dryer in the house. So there she is, in front of about a hundred people, doing the laundry. When the first load finished drying, she dumped the 2nd load into the washer, striped to the skin, put the cloths she was wearing into the washer, started the washer, and then sorted through the stuff that had come out of the dryer to get dressed.

I wasn’t sure how to deal with that. The thing is, you see, that if she had been arrested for that shit in Arizona she would be considered a sex offender for life … not good. And she
was a grade school teach to boot … we’re talking instant big problems here …

I took her into the desert several times and let her and the kids run around naked, but that didn’t do it for her. She wanted the thrill of being naked in public. She needed it, I guess.

Eventually she started giving blowjobs to her Priest. I got off work early one day, came home, walked into the house, and there she was, squatted naked on the living room floor with a Jesuit dick in her mouth. That was more than I could deal with and eventually we split the blankets.

I suppose, in hind sight, that I should have taken her to nude dance club and let her get her jollies that way, but I cannot, honestly, see any happy ending to this.