Penis Vampire: a preternatural being, commonly believed to be a reanimated corpse that bites your dick instead of your neck.
Jake: blah I vant to suck your dick!
Johnny: oh shit! Jake’s a penis vampire!!!
Duke: but there are no bite marks on his neck, how can this be happing?
Johnny: it was Emily, that b*tch she bit his dick and turned him into a undead cocksucker.