[osreb]

Some gay humor:

Two gay men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm together, and then
have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated.

When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital.

A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are crying and screaming.
Over in the corner, one baby is smiling serenely.

A nurse comes by, and, to the delight of the two gays, she points out the
happy child as theirs. 'Isn't it wonderful?' one gay says to the other.
'All these unhappy babies... and yet our baby is so happy. This just
proves our love for one another.'

The nurse says, 'Oh sure, he's happy now. But just watch what happens when
we pull the pacifier out of his ass,

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Loving Wife

A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns.
Inside, he finds couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair.
While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up & goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife:
'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes!
He's probably spent a lot of time in jail
and hasn't seen a woman in years.
I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain...do what ever he tells you.
Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you.
This guy is obviously very dangerous.
If he gets angry, he'll kill us both.
Be strong, honey. I love you!'

His wife responds: 'He wasn't kissing my neck.
He was whispering in my ear.
He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline.
I told him it was in the bathroom.
Be strong honey. I love you too.'