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Old 12-26-2008, 04:23 PM
osreb osreb is offline
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Default Putting your Affairs In Order

The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, 'I've some bad news.
You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order.'

The woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the
waiting room where her daughter had been waiting. 'Well, daughter, we
women celebrate when things are good, and we celebrate when things don't
go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I have cancer. Let's
head to the club and have a martini.'

After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less somber. There
were some laughs and more martinis. They were eventually approached by
some of the woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two
were celebrating. The woman said they were drinking to her impending
end. 'I've been diagnosed with AIDS.'

The friends were aghast, gave the woman their condolences and beat a
hasty retreat. After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned over
and whispered, 'Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and
you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do
that??'

'Because I don't want any of those b*tches sleeping with your father
after I'm gone.'

And THAT, my friends, is what is called, 'Putting Your Affairs In Order.'
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