I'm not married but one I dated and had and still have serious feelings for and probably would have been open to marrying but she and both generally do open relationships but she wanted a marriage situation to be a closed relationship and I told her honestly that she is an admitted (although not diagnosed) nymphomaniac and sex is a major part of her identity and how she expresses herself and I told her bluntly
"While I do love and care about you, a closed relationship will never work for you, if you lock eyes with the mailman, you're gonna hook up with him, because you've done this before" and I continued
"We dated for 4 years and you had 21 outside sexual partners in that time. You'd come home with bite marks and hickeys on your breasts, cum stains on your pants, your vagina would be red and obviously swollen from sex, and even sometimes you'd come home with your bra in your purse and while that never bothered me, it was obvious that your dreams of a closed traditional relationship/marriage was never going to happen"
I never cared that she hooked up with other men, I'm just wired like that but what bothered me was that she thought should just turn things off like a switch and be a traditional monagamous wife.
Did I trust her around other men? I trusted that she was going to have some sort of contant with at least one of them and sexual contact could range from sharing nudes to all out sex.
|