[Fox Mulder]

I LOVE YOU FUNNY FACE is proud to present you the 2022 INTERNATIONAL TRACK SITTING COMPETITION. The sport was the brainchild of German voyeur Hans Onminadich -who discovered that female athletes seem to spend a lot of time sitting on tracks...tracks they should be running, walking very fast or jumping on. Onminadich believed that competition drives us to great heights and yes, terrible lows. It's to the latter that he asked himself why. Why should women just sit there relaxing, waiting for a sports competition to start while men stare between their legs looking for camel toes or pantie lines? Why not make a competition out of the sitting? And just so, a new sport was born. Sure, Ominadich had trouble selling his idea at first...ever...still...but he fought hard to make gullible people believe in his dream. Athletes now gather every four years to Track Sit. The rules of competition are: 1. Attractive athletes in skimpy track and field outfits will sit on Olympic quality tracks. Shoes are optional. Competitors must sit still, no hand use allowed. The goal is to sit pretty for as long as possible. The last woman sitting wins. No one outside of sports voyeurs and serious wankers knows this is a thing. Still, I LOVE YOU FUNNYFACE was the venue awarded with this year's competition, so we're going for it. As there are no tracks on this thread, the athlete's have brought their own. Let's check out the action...