[Saddledrifter]

We had just landed in England after a long cross-Atlantic flight and made it to our Bed and Breakfast dead dog tired. It was mid-afternoon, but we had not slept in several days, so we hit the hay and were out in seconds. About 8:00 p.m., we started hearing a woman's screams from the room adjacent to ours. We immediately awoke -- the screams were really loud. I asked my wife if she thought it was someone making love? She said that if that was the case, she thought that there would be some sounds emitted by the male. I said that the woman was either having a great climax or was being knifed to death. I heard her saying, "Please stop -- I can't take any more." I looked at my wife and said, "What should we do?" If someone is being murdered, and we just sat here, we are almost guilty as an accomplish." My wife said, "Yes, but if she is getting a massive 15 minute intense climax, I don't want to throw water on them. Besides, if we determine that she is getting sex that great, I just may walk over there and let him have a go at me!" I said, "Gee, thanks!" About that time we heard some guttural sounds being emitted by the male. It was at this time that we decided that they were having fantastic sex. We both got on our knees on the bed, and put our ears up to the wall to hear every lustful moment.

Finally, we could tell that he was leaving for the evening. My wife, who was totally nude, could not stand to let him leave without seeing what a stud like that looked like. She bolted for the door as he opened theirs. The B&B had only one bathroom on each floor for all the rooms. My wife walked out nude in the hall and almost bumped into him. She said, "Oh, excuse me, I was on my way to the bathroom and didn't realize anyone was out here." He said, "Not to worry." I think my wife was disappointed he didn't grab her naked body and pull her into the room and lay his wood to her. She came back into our room, and disappointedly said,"He just looked like a regular guy." I said, "Good!" The woman remained in the room the rest of the night and slept like a baby -- I assume.

However, the next morning I heard her getting ready to leave. I felt turn about was fair play. As soon as she opened the door to leave, I bolted out of our room totally nude -- just as my wife had done. I repeated the same lines my wife had used. She said, as he had, "Don't be concerned about it." I returned to our room, and reported just the same thing to my wife. "She looked just like a regular woman." Just to get even with my wife, I said, "Maybe I could give her a spin under the covers tonight, and you could listen and rate the screw against the one last night on a sound meter." She didn't thank that was so funny.