[grahamorpur]

I’ve never seen a girl nude. Might as well get that out the way from the off. When I got my first stash of ‘nudie books’ back in the 60s – found them in a locker at school – I saw Harrison Marks mags with nude girls but censored. For years I thought that was how girls were. I used a piece of paper or card to cover up the lower bit when I wanked on them. Later I used to draw knickers in.

Fortunately I found the Spick & Span magazines, which were girl next door, miniskirt, raised skirt, stockings, knickers, bikinis, some topless, but no more. In those days I had no money so buying mags was not something I could do a lot of. I did manage to acquire mags like Parade when I did my paper round – I remember looking through one and seeing this lovely girl topless wearing stockings and knickers, lovely poses, and She made me cum in my pants.

When I wasn’t looking at my dirty books I was happiest looking out my window and wanking on all the girls walking by. There weren’t that many, but as soon as I saw a girl in a miniskirt, that was more than enough. When I got older I’d spend time on the streets in my wank-mac, hoping to see sexy-dressed girls and cum in my pants.

Even now the excitement of seeing a girl in a magazine or online posing in a short skirt, showing knickers or maybe stocking-tops, is indescribable, and I’m soon in ecstasy. Back then I remember seeing girls topless at a pool party in Playboy magazine and not being able to work out how that could be – surely they knew all the men there could see them?

Nowadays you see all sorts of things online you’re not expecting to see, like clicking on a link and suddenly there’s these pics of girls all nude with men all around, like on a beach or by a pool or something. Sometimes the men are nude too, so I’m wondering why there’s not hard-ons, and surely the girls know the men might want to do stuff, seeing them like that?

Then I remember that those men are used to seeing girls nude, like they’ve had girlfriends or wives and so on, so I guess it’s no big deal. Obviously if you’re a wanker like me then it’s difficult to understand.

In the early days I used to think how daring those girls in Spick & Span were, showing all their knickers sometimes, even raising their skirts right up, not just showing their stocking-tops – which was enough for me, I’ve only seen that rarely in real life – but right up past their knix! Years later I found pics online of some of those girls in other magazines, posing nude, and I realised that it was no big deal to them to show their knix – it was a very big deal for me though and gives me ecstasy to this day.

On the occasions I saw girls showing stocking-tops, or even knix for real, I’d cum in my pants if I could see for a minute or so. I have a vast collection of photos of girls posing in short skirts showing stockings and knix, as well as all my Spick, Span, Spick & Span and Beautiful Britons magazines, and this is all the sex pleasure I need. I don’t go out in my mac any more (CCTV, phone cameras etc) and though I still get occasional Worship Sessions with Goddesses I worship, it’s not the same without Miss Lisa, the first girl I ever saw pose, showing Her knix, and making me cum in my pants in front of Her.

There were many lovely girls online who posed in short skirts, in the Spick and Span style, like Miss Kirsty Blue, Miss Bubbly Blonde, Miss Christine, Miss Christina, and Miss Joanne Legshow Jo. Sometimes I could correspond over email with the girls I worshipped, and I loved to tell them they made me spunk my pants looking at their pics and videos. My huge collection of all their photos never ceases to give me perv ecstasy and wet pants, and I still have masses of their photos I haven’t got to yet.

I can only look at the traditional style photos though. Girls who pose now, a lot of them look at the camera like they were expecting something from you, like if they’re posing in a bedroom and it’s like they’re inviting the viewer to come to bed, and there’s an expectation in their eyes.

Now that frightens me to death. Not that any girl has ever wanted to have anything to do with me – I don’t socialise, can’t really speak to girls or look them in the eyes, so it’s not a situation that ever arises. But the idea that I would be expected to know what to say and do, to ‘perform’, that terrifies me cause if it ever did happen, I’d be exposed as a useless pervert, a wimp who hardly needs to see anything and only wanks himself.

There’s so much nudity online now, as well as porn. I used to be so naive about it all, it wasn’t something I ever thought about. I didn’t know why girls posed in magazines, I was just very grateful they did as it was the only way I got to see what I needed for my pleasure. In those days if you were caught looking when a girl showed you could be in trouble – “what are you looking at?!”.

You never saw anything about sex on telly, not back then, and at the movies if men and women were in bed they had their clothes on, and for a long time I thought men never saw women naked. How stupid can you get?! It wasn’t until I was nearly in my 40s that I first saw people having sex, on a VHS tape – they’d just come out – playing in a dirty bookshop I used to go to.

It wasn’t anything like as explicit as they are now, but I was shocked, thinking the bloke was hurting the girl. How the lady in the shop laughed when I asked Her what was happening, what was he doing to Her – but She knew of course how many years I’d been going to Her shop and just how many 100s of dirty books I’d bought, i.e. She knew I was a perv.

I always had a fantasy as a kid of being nude and rubbing my knob in front of fully-dressed girls, so that they would know I was a wanker – I love girls to know I’m a wanker. I’d never do it of course, it would be horrible for them. For years I thought girls would never see anything as ugly as an erect knob.

I don’t watch porn, but it’s impossible to avoid, so I do know now how naive I was back then. As far as I know a cock is usually hard before it goes in, so I assume girls have seen stiff cocks – not that I’m saying every girl has been with several men or even more than one, I’d never assume that. I know all sorts happens in porn, I’m talking about in real life. But of course I’d still never dream of showing mine, absolutely no way, how horrible that would be for anyone seeing. Several girls have seen me cum in my pants as I watched them show (stocking-tops, sometimes even knickers, cleavage, that’s all) though, and really that’s the pinnacle for me, like with Miss Lisa all those times.

In porn it seems anything goes though. Though I only see sn*tches every now and again, I navigate away as soon as it comes on the screen, I’m now relieved that it all seems ok. I’ve even seen girls with two or even three men, and not long back I’d have called the police! But I think a lot of those girls are in control, it’s even their website, you read what they’ve put and they seem to know what they’re doing, even enjoy it.

For a while I was a member of Miss Angela White’s site. I still worship Her now of course. She drives me mad with Her lovely curves and the things She wears, though She does get too nude for me. I love Her cleavage poses though, ecstasy for a perv like me.

She does some incredible things, and I’m sure it’s ok cause it’s Her site. So I used to have one of Her videos on one of my screens, and open up Her photoset on the other. Some of Her videos She’s with two men, and though I don’t watch it I’ve an idea what She’s doing with them, and of course I can hear the Sounds of Sex.

Meanwhile I’ve got Her first pic on screen and She’s oh, so bosomy in one of Her lovely dresses, so, so curvy and breathtaking cleavage. I love the humiliation of hearing Her being fucked (I think that’s the right expression) on Her video – as that’s what normal people do, that’s what real men do with women – while She’s making me cum in my pants with Her fully-dressed cleavage poses! How I’d love Her to know (ohhh and even call me a wanker!) but I don’t supposed She’d be in the slightest bit interested.

In the 80s I did for the first time see films like the Russ Meyer ones. I went in the cinema in my rainmac, it was nearly empty with just a few other perverts, and saw for the first time in my life on the screen girls moving, talking and very skimpy-dressed, dancing in bikinis, soon to be nude. I’d already cum in my pants seeing them in bikinis or low-cut tops by then though.

When Miss Christy Hartburg comes on screen at the beginning of Super Vixens, She’s wearing a mind-blowing low-cut top with lovely big-bosom cleavage, and She made me squirm in my seat as She walked along, hardly believing my eyes and quivering all over as She made me fill my pants with spunk. There was no videos in those days and you didn’t see anything like that on telly. I’d seen cleavage and even bikinis once or twice, and go-go dancers, always making me spunk my pants, but those films were something else. Several times girls in those movies made me spunk my pants in the cinema, sitting there in my dirty mac like the other perverts, mouth open, pants and trousers soaked with cum.

I dreamed about seeing girls pose for real, I’d seen the ads in Escort magazine for amateur photo-sessions, but of course I couldn’t go – those girls made me spunk my pants looking at their photos, just think what would happen if I saw them pose for real! I couldn’t wear my mac obviously – everyone would see my wet patch!

Years later I remember very well going to ‘City Clickers’ in Sheffield after seeing amateur photo sessions advertised in Peaches (big tits) magazines. I don’t know what I was thinking, I guess I’d just got so desperate over the years to see a girl actually pose, after collecting 1000s and 1000s of girlie mags, that I’d convinced myself it would be ok.

Arriving in my ‘dirty’ mac and wank-trousers, my trusty ‘perv’ outfit, including flat cap and goggle-eye glasses, I looked every inch your typical perv, dirty old man in a rainmac.

I didn’t even have a camera. I shuffled nervously through the door to the studio, and this guy, obviously a proper photographer walked by, looking me up and down. I peered round the door into the studio itself, and there was a large room, and in front of me a low stage with a chair and stuff on it. Behind a curtain at the back of the stage I could hear a girl’s voice, talking and laughing, and it sounded like a couple of blokes were there chatting to Her.

Suddenly I had this image of the girl coming out into the studio with all the photographers there, throwing off Her robe and standing there nude while they all clicked away. I turned tail and bolted! Sad wanker!

Eventually in my 40s I did go to a studio, and saw Miss Lisa pose, showing Her knickers and making me cum in my pants in front of Her. She let me worship Her for years, letting me see just a little even though She’d posed nude for lots of blokes. Her photos were only miniskirt, raised skirt and knix, but more than enough for me.

Some of the online girls who had their own sites and did the Spick & Span type poses I worshipped for years. Miss Christina UK always replied and I’d soon told Her everything about me, including even my mac-wanking escapades. She’d email me to say Her pics going up that day were of Her in a very short skirt so She was hoping “you’ll spunk in your pants in a few minutes”. I emailed Her later to tell Her I did, and included a worship sheet showing ‘me’ doing it.

The thing was, She posed nude as well. Even did porn. Another Goddess who I collected 1000s of pics of was Miss Joanne Legshow Jo. She did Spick & Span poses but 1000 x over, and She made me spunk my pants more than any other girl ever. I found pics of Her online where She’d posed nude too, which I found very exciting as I’d always thought She only did the knicker-show type of photos on Her website. Very exciting to think girls like that let men see Her nude.

I only needed to see Her in one of Her lovely outfits though, doing a stunning pose, absolutely bare all the way from Her sex-queen high heels, past Her stocking-tops and every inch of the way to Her knick-knix. Instant ecstasy for this girl-worshipping pervert. Yes, She posed nude before, even for amateurs according to one of the forums I read, but nude is more than I can handle, and I only need to see lovely girls fully-dressed, sexy dressed, to get all my perv sex pleasure.