[shiftyj]

Early twenties, just out of college. I started dating a lady in her mid 30s. Which, at least to me at 23 was unimaginably old, but hey, she was good looking, smart, and interested in me. She was sophisticated, had done more than one tour in the army and was a lawyer. We hadn't done more than make out, when one night at a bar she got plastered drunk. Way too drunk for me to consider screwing around with. Plus, did I mention she was a criminal lawyer? My non-drinking buddy drove her and me in my car to her place to drop her off. I got her inside and she started trying to get me to stay. I explained we were all in my car- where would my buddy stay? She said she'd fuck him too, and started in on wanting a threesome. She started threatening to scream if I didn't stay with her - plus laid on a guilt trip that I had been 'leading her on' if I didn't stay. So I agreed we'd all drive back to my place, my friend could walk the 3 blocks to his house, and she could stay at my place.

One at my apartment it was a chore getting her from the car to the stairs. I went back outside and thanked my friend and apologized for all this. When I got back inside, there she was on the stair landing with her pants and panties down to mid-thigh, asking me do do her there, and kind of whining about it. Worrying about the other apartments in the building, I got her to my apartment and to my couch.

Cussing under my breath I went to brush teeth, get some water in me and go to bed. When I got to bed, there she was naked, spread out. And, being a dumb youth of 23, I was kind of grossed out by the the less-than Playboy model perfection of a 35 year old woman who's had a couple of kids (but was still in great shape looking back at it, her boobs were just saggy. I know better now.) So, I was very unenthusiastic. She was drunk, I wanted no part of it, but I gave up.

I got in bed and she was all over me. I couldn't even get it up I was so unattractied to her, and she got mad. Finally we got it in and somewhere in there she passed out on top of me. Worst ever.

The next morning she acted like nothing was wrong and was all chipper like we were one level higher in our relationship and refused to believe half of what I said happened. A few days later she accused me of cheating on her because I didn't call her all day and then she was out of my life. Yay.