Quote:
Originally Posted by ulsafiu
I want to start by saying that I love asking my girlfriends about their sexual past. It really turns me on. I find exciting to imagine them doing dirty things with their former partners and I often masturbate thinking about it.
However, when you develop a romantic love for someone; retroactive jealousy is unavoidable.
Just to be clear; personally, it's not a big deal. I still love to listen to her stories and I notice how the relationship strengthens every time we do it. But, from time to time, weird thoughts come to my mind. They go away fast, but they do come and that's not very pleasant.
So, my question to all of you (whom I consider to be wiser than me in those regards) is... how do you deal with retroactive jealousy? What can someone (not precisely me but someone who might be really struggling) get over the fact that his GF/Wife had sexual experiences with other men?
I will start:
• A relationship must be based on trust and when the loved one trusts you with that information; the relationship strengthens significantly.
• As Sun Tzu said: “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”. Basically, if you know how their former lovers pleased her; you can easily top that.
• She had all the right to enjoy her sex life before being with you; in the same way that you did it. She enjoyed and was enjoyed. And that's fine.
What is your piece of advice?
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IMO, you got it right the first time.
Simply enjoy getting turned on that another man has kissed, touched and licked your girl where you kiss and lick her. Another man was inside of her and knows what it's like to make her cum and get her vagina soaking wet.
I hang around this guy who's not a friend of mine but just someone I see now and then. When we was out of town for a week, his gf and I fucked like rabbits. Now I get to say to myself, "I know what your girl's pussy tastes like, and my penis has memorized the feeling of her vaginal walls."
It works in reverse also, because I get hard meeting one of her exes, and say to myself, "He's fucking banged my girl." I get totally hard.