Quote:
Originally Posted by Fox Mulder
Thanks to Klondike for coming back and clearing up some things. As for the discussion here, it's not a personal attack on Klondike. That's certainly not how my comment was intended. I think what's going on here is just members trying to air concerns about what just happened and discussing how to deal with it in the future.
While deletions are a pain in the ass, Schlubby said something interesting about deletions being a fallback against bosses and ex wives attornies... in case things go wrong in real life. This brings up a whole new, but related, squirmy can of worms I feel compelled to say something about. It's the ugly underside of what we're doing here...something most of us (including me) tend to ignore. All over the Internet there are guys posting pictures of wives and other women without their knowledge. When these women find out ( and Han Solo is right, women ALWAYS find out) relationships and lives can be ruined. I'm guessing that might be behind some of the regret Klondike is feeling and frankly, me too. We alI have to grapple with the idea that when we repost those types of pictures, we're possibly contributing to someone's humiliation. Klondike wrote about escaping into the little world we create here. I fully comprehend that idea. I do a lot of escaping here myself. Here's this wonderful little place inhabited by beautiful naked women we never meet...and fun people with colorful names and avatars... that we never meet. It's all safe and annonymous. Until it isn't. Hey, I love it when there's a woman here posting her own stuff, or an open minded couple, doing it together. It's the revenge porn and the stuff posted without the woman's knowledge that gives me pause. I think that might be part of Klondike's realization. A lot of the WNBR, Freemont Solstice, Naturists and women on beaches might not care if they end up on a porn site. But certainly some do. I love the pictures, but I'm thinking less and less about this fantasy world and more and more about the real life women who unwittingly inhabit it. I don't want to moralize or judge anyone. However, If you're posting pictures of someone you care about without their consent, you probably SHOULD delete all your stuff. Then go back and have a conversation with
that person you're posting without consent. Explain how much it turns you on that other's might enjoy her pictures. She might surprise you. If everyone posted and posting here is here by choice, it's better for members, mods...everyone.
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That's a pretty fair assessment overall.
I was thinking not long ago that I never wanted to be the type of guy that women couldn't trust. But when you shoot pics of them naked in public and then post them on line, you are establishing a relationship with them even if you don't know them personally or even talk to them. Is that a relationship based on trust? No, probably not. Am I happy about that? No, but I can get around any negative feelings by staying focused on the fantasy element and finding other ways to justify what I've done. But I think every woman that contemplates appearing naked in public makes a mental estimate beforehand as to the likelihood that they will appear naked online, then acts accordingly based on their own comfort level with that. I make mental estimates too and don't want theirs to be really low, so I try to shoot and post accordingly too. And if I've erred on the wrong side, then we have a breach of trust. But every event is different, and whether it's commercially motivated, protest oriented or would never benefit from any publicity whatsoever, all that enters into the equation too.
Anyway, I know people come here for the pics and because this thread doesn't have any yet and has been taken over by my rambling, who know what the mods will do with it. Oh, crispus did post a few. Good.
But if I had 3% of my threads here deleted, that's like saying I'm 97% guilt free overall even after having stepped outside of the fantasy bubble for a while and taken a deep breath. What remains here stays here.
I've dealt with it, both here and over at flickr. Along the way, a few others lost posts in the fallout. Hopefully with enough interest, the more popular threads can get rebuilt.
K