[Fox Mulder]

1. These kids today...They're always on the Internet and never have their minds on what they're doing!
2. These kids today...They don't know how to relax. They can't even wait for a meal without needing to occupy themselves!
3. "I'll tell you this...when I was a girl the cum tasted A LOT better than it does nowadays!" ( These kids don't know what they're missing)
4. These kids today...My generation used to eat a good breakfast. Now all they have time for in the morning is a quick piece of ass.
5. "Hey...he likes it and I enjoy doing it. So, you damned kids just mind your own business!"
6. It's tough being a horny single mother...you try to take a little time to yourself and the kids are always busting in on you, needing attention.
7. In my day we used to go to drive- in theaters and fuck. Now it's just mutual masturbation on the curb.
8. "So I'm like 'fuck you' and she's all 'why?' And I go 'Dude, you got like humongous tits' and I grab one...and she goes 'That's so gay' and..." (I don't really know what she's saying either)
9.These kids today...my generation took "instant" Poloroid nudie pics. We kept them hidden in shoe boxes and no one ever saw them except for our significant others. Now everyone's an Internet porn star!
10. These kids today can kiss my ass!