1. "Do I really want to shove something up my pussy that looks like one of my father's deep sea fishing lures?"
2. Awwww...Can't you just hear Dionne Warwick and Elton John singing "That's what friends are for."
3. "These things taste so much better after they've been used." ( For a real taste treat, swap 'em!)
4. " My dildo never complains. It never snores. It will never get me knocked up. Men? Who needs them?"
5. "This toy comes in " Average Six Inch"..."Deluxe Eight Inch"..."Super Ten Inch" and "Shredded Cervix Foot Long" models."
6. That ain't "Love Potion Number Nine" she's putting on that thing! You, Sir, are about to experience why this witch is considered "wicked."
7. Now this is a rip off. Ouch!