[Fox Mulder]

1."Help us, Brad Pitt!" Looks like the zombies have caught up to those folks from back in post #472. (See post #472)
2. Speaking of members of the walking dead...
3. Another mayor's daughter delivered to her doorstep by the members of Delta House. (What? You haven't seen "Animal House?")
4. "Ugh! Am I really THIS horny?"
5. "Oh yipee! The orgy has begun! I wanna be fucked too! Fuck me, OK? Yeah!" (Group sex is best when the participants are enthusiastic.)
6.Darwin was right. Here's positive proof that men and monkeys are related.

THE ACME DILDO COMPANY HAS SOME NEW PRODUCTS...
7. Those delicious new marzipan dildos are all the rage with foodies.
8. The new smart torpedo dildo has happily found it's mark.
9. The new invisible dildo was great for airport check ins, but not so good if you forget which bag you put it in.

10. "OK! OK!!! If you twist my arm...I'll show you one of my breasts!"