[bbgapril]

Candles will be nice. Let's go there next. Because candles are romantic. Candlelight is flattering to a woman's skin and they smell good. Those two are fine. Pick out two holders to put them on. No, you can't just use a couple of beer coasters. Because they could catch something on fire. A candle is romantic. An uncontrolled fire is not.

A quick stop at the sporting goods section. Look around you. Maybe a ping pong paddle. No? They bring back memories of visits to the junior high school principal's office? Ick! That's not the thought you want running through your head tonight. We'll skip the paddles. Anything else around here you like? Okay, we'll just move on.

Still have the same sized bed? Because we're going to buy you some new sheets. They are not perfectly fine. Your mother got them at an outlet store for you when you were ten. They're not cool and retro. They're misprints. They say STAR TERK for heaven's sake. They don't say you're a guy with a sense of humor. They say you're a pathetic loser who just moved from his mom's basement. Get new ones! At least 300 count. They're silkier and much nicer to sleep on. The higher the number, the better. Yes. They're scratchy and they smell funny right now. Be sure you wash them as soon as you get home.