[Fox Mulder]

(Captions read left to right- top to bottom)

1. Any woman who brings a butt plug to the bath shouldn't be surprised to see a cock show up.
2. There's got to be an easier way for a girl to get some shampoo...
3. "OK, cameras rolling? ...Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Gina. I'm a chemical engineer who has come up with a new toilet paper which causes orgasms. I am about to try an experimental wipe...I am now placing the tissue between my legs thus and..."
4. "...ahhhh! Oh God! Yeeees! it works!" (Orgasmic toilet paper...it beats squeezing the Charmin)