Queen of spades
 

I have several questions about this:


do they constantly wear a sign visible to all?

how do their acquaintances react?

How her husbands react ?

are they only approached by black men?

Do they know how to say no to a guy they don't like?

How many interracial relationships make you a QOS?

Since you mentioned your QoS tendency, have you had a more active sex life?


For you men reading this, are there many QOS in your circle?
Or Or are your acquaintances not BBC or don't want it to be known?

So for my wife it was about the Latin guys. Outside of me she had only hooked up with one other white guy while married and the rest were Cuban or Puerto Rican. Two black guys. The anklet thing in my experience was bs- but that might be because more women wear anklets in general where we are so it holds no significance. She did wear a black ring on her right hand which worked better- or just found people on dating sites or hotel bars known for alternative lifestyles.

However, One of my very good friends is a queen of spades, the only white guy she sleeps with is her husband. She’ll wear it on a necklace or a stomach chain- no tattoos. She’s a teacher and keeps it discriminate. They will go to bars and lifestyle spaces where the men know what it means and approach, or she and her husband find them on some lifestyle sites.

If someone approaches her and she’s not into them, she just says “no”. It’s the shortest and easiest sentence in the world.

I don’t think what constitutes being a queen of spades is necessarily how many black guys you have been with, I think it’s just your preference. You can sleep with one black dude and have a white husband or a black husband and be a queen of spades because you prefer black men.

Just my two cents.

When I Saw Queen of Spades
 

my first thought was remembering the old joke about the raven-haired woman who went to a costume party wearing only black gloves and socks.

Yes 4 of spades or 5 of spade depending if she is shaved

No more idea or explanation ?

What about the Ace of Spades? A bush and one black glove on the right hand and one black sock on the left foot

Do you have such a picture?

People in the swinging lifestyle run that gamut from just one experience, to occasionally, to heavily and constantly, and everywhere in between. There is no standard behavior or frequency, and most don't trumpet what they're doing out into the vanilla world.

Most of the ones I've known keep it pretty quiet. It's not socially acceptable.

That's as individual as there are couples and husbands doing it. Most of them are quite fine with it.

I don't get this question. Attractive women, or even average looking women for that matter, may be approached by men of any color.

Sure. "Thanks, but no thanks," probably works fine.

Individual self-identity is also quite variable. Some go so far as to get QOS tattoos or wear specific jewelry. Some don't make a big fuss about it at all but fuck mostly black guys. Or a 50/50 mix of black/white, or whatever. Again, it's as variable as the couple and the people they meet.

For swingers of all flavors who are in healthy relationships, they mostly all report enhanced closeness, and better relationships, and a ramp-up of their sex lives is almost always part of it.


My wife and I were close swinger friends with another swinger couple and played together for years. But then the other wife went black and stayed black. She had a decade long relationship with a black boyfriend whom she saw every few weeks, year in and year out.

So for me, just one in my circle of friends.

Again, it's not socially acceptable to the vanilla world. Even amongst swinger friends, they generally don't do much "kiss and tell." Of course, some groups of swinger friends know who's screwing who, but it's not something you spread around with reckless abandon.