Fun with the TSA
 

My wife and I were flying with our baby and my wife had some baby milk that is shelf stable, meaning in a carton. Since the TSA couldn't see inside, they required my wife to be patted down. Now how does a pat down help the milk to be safe?

My wife was wearing a skirt that went just below her knees and a tank top, so not much place to hide anything. A very big and burly female TSA agent with a short haircut was assigned the pat down and seemed a bit too happy to be doing it. I held the baby as my wife assumed the position of standing with her arms outstretched.

I have to admit it was a bit exciting to see this TSA agent start by going up and down the sides of her dress with her hands before touching her front and cupping her breasts over her bra. But the best part was when she started and her ankles and moved up under her skirt with her hands disappearing. I saw my wife's eyes get wide in surprise. She then did the breast again and then did the up under the skirt again from the front.

I looked around and noticed a couple of guys were taking their time getting their things from the belt and were watching my wife's pat down.

When she was released, my wife said she felt like she had been molested as the TSA agent touched the back of her ass cheeks (thong panties) two times with the back of her hand then drew her hands up her crotch and felt her vagina over her panties.

When we got to the hotel my wife went right to the shower as she wanted to wash away the thought.

Anyone else have similar TSA views?

After my wife got out of the scanner I asked out loud if she thought they could see her bush. I expected her to hit but she just said probably

What's that buzz?
 

On a business trip with several colleagues, we met at the airport to begin our cross-country trip. Four guys and a fifth co-worker, an attractive but conservative and very reserved middle-aged woman. After getting our boarding passes, we gathered where you drop off your checked bags. As she dropped her bag onto the conveyor belt, a buzzing sound started coming from her bag, prompting the TSA agent to grab it off the belt. We stood around as he opened it for further inspection, and behold, as soon as he opened the main compartment, out fell a large battery-powered plastic penis happily buzzing away, one of those really big ones with the rabbit ears on the end. It was obvious whose bag it was, so the agent handed the buzzing vibrator to the lady and asked her to please turn it off and remove the batteries.

So there she was, standing in the middle of a crowded airport terminal, dressed in smart business attire, holding her vibrator for all to see, frantically trying to get it to stop buzzing. She finally got it stopped, pocketed the batteries, and handed it back to TSA. Seeing us four guys trying to not look at her vibrator and trying even harder to not look at her, she finally broke the ice by addressing us and saying something like "Okay, guys, you know we'll be away for a week, and I can't go that long without help, so now you've seen it, let's all have a good laugh and get on the plane." After that, we five became very close buddies.

We were in line waiting to go through the TSA security check, I heard my wife moan and do a little gasp, I looked at her to see if something was wrong. She said that TSA asked that tall guy to take off his belt before walking through the metal detector, she said the way he whipped his belt off made her imagine he was going to spank her with it, her favorite kink. That was what got the sexual response from her.