Advice for First Time Nudist Resort with Friends
 

My wife and I got invited to go a nudist resort for the first time with another married couple we've been friends with for a few years.

Neither of us have ever been to one of these resorts. My wife and I have frequented many natural hot springs, and have gone with this couple twice. Apart from changing outside, we weren't naked with the couple at all. However, my wife and I have been naked many times at the hot springs by ourselves and around a few strangers, and are comfortable.

I have a few sincere questions I figured this community may be able to help with.

My wife is reluctant to go because she is afraid seeing mutual friends naked would make things weird going forward. We are very comfortable with this couple, however, and this would be strictly platonic plans.

Has anyone had friendships affected positively or negatively by seeing/being around one another nude?

The husband is a bigger guy than I am, and I am definitely a "grower" as they say. I'm worried about being embarrassed in front of his wife, and mine, if the penis size is largely different while flaccid and relaxed. Is that a normal concern and one easily gotten over once we're all naked?

Any thoughts on how I can make my wife more comfortable? Again, it's not the nudity aspect, but the nude with friends aspect.

Any other thoughts or helpful advice?

Thanks!

Not an issue
 

I think you are overthinking things. Since everyone has agreed to go to the resort, there shouldn't really be any issues. There will be lots of other people there, some growers and some show-res. You'll probably be average, nothing to worry about. Same with the women...lots of average people at such places. As for feeling weird afterwards, since you're all mature adults I don't think that will happen, in fact I suspect it will strengthen your friendship. My wife and I have run into friends at a nude beach and it made us like them more.

The anxiety about seeing someone you know is based on embarassment - what will they think of me?
With the unspoken presumption that they are clothed and you are naked. But that's not the case. They aren't going to tell everyone they saw you there, because that would disclose they were there naked too.

The most likely outcome of meeting someone you know is that you now have something more in common with an acquaintance who then becomes a friend - isn't that a good thing?

It only becomes weird if it is sexual - which, in a genuine naturist/nudist environment (ie not swinging), it is not. People who have not experienced this have difficulty believing this - until they experience it themselves. We are on a porn site and people's brains are in porn fantasy mode, so accepting this is even more difficult here.

Did you not discuss these anxieties, in some detail, with your friends when they invited you?

Have you checked the websites of bona-fide naturist/nudist organizations (eg affiliated with the INF or AANR) which have extensive explanations which show that your fears are, in practice, completely unfounded - although common anxieties.

I would think it depends on the destination. If a naturalist place what are you thinking is of a concern?
If other, (swingers, fairly liberal sexual rules) I’d be looking for advise…

Acclimatise
 

If it's an option, perhaps try to acclimatise by going to a clothed beach first. Thong + small bikini top is now totally acceptable, so your wife can get used to the couple seeing her nearly naked, maybe even topless, then the final step will be much easier.

Your wife may also be concerned about pubic hair styles. It's a bit more risky but you could discreetly mention this to the husband to find out the other couple's style so she (and you) have the option to 'match' if you want to.

For yourself, go to a gym / pool where you can be naked in the changing room to get used to being around other guys naked (although in your case it sounds like you've already done more than this, how do you know he's bigger?)

Please feed back on how it goes!

It's a "common" concern. We have friends we've invited to the resort; but they (specifically the BF) chickened out because of his concerns about the "aftermath" of us having seen each other naked. "How do you "come back" from that?" I've personally found the answer to be: quite easily, actually.

What's the actual "aftermath"? It's often just knowing you've seen each other naked. As Anonjohn mentioned, if the experience at the resort has been non-sexual; that's all there is to it. Sure, they're going to know more "intimate details" about your anatomy; but if your friends are genuine nudists, it's not going to redefine how they "see" you back in the real world. It's just "extra information." You will probably find that your "post-resort" interactions remain exactly the same; except maybe for the occasional joke about having "seen each other naked."

I assume the resort is C/O. Look it up online. C/O resorts allows newbies to stay covered; so if your wife is a bit reticent to be naked right away in front of your friends, she can always take a "gradual" approach by bringing/wearing a sarong. And taking it off when she's ready. Women tend to support each other in these "situations"; so I'm sure your friend's wife will do the same and help alleviate some of her anxieties.

My wife and I are friends with an old co-worker of mine we ran into at our resort. Sure, it was weird at first; for about 10 minutes. When we meet up "in the real world", you'd never know we regularly hang out naked at a resort. Unlike most non-nudist friends, we all know the women are shaven, what their boobs look like; or which guy is "bigger" and whose labia is "thicker." But still, it doesn't even figure into our "real world" interactions. There's no "weirdness" or tension at all. I expect it would be the same for you.

Hope this helps! I think it'll be fun.

We have never been to a nudist resort. But we have seen many of our friends naked in sauna, on a beach etc. And it has never affected anything. Do not be afraid. (If it is a normal nude resort, not swingers or something like that.)

resort
 

Don't worry one bit,I've been twice with my ex to nudist resorts and 10 years to nude beaches,everyone there wants to be nude and they don't care if your nude,everyone is very friendly too,the staff is very friendly and you'll make new friends and have a great time.

Suggest
 

Strongly suggest visiting the AANR. Website.

Just relax and enjoy.
Only the first 10m are a bit awkward, after that it just feels normal seeing eachother naked.
Even afterwards, nothing will change. They remain the same people, you've just seen each other naked.
And nowadays, naked is not that much less clothing that some of those small bikinis. Often seeing eachother naked is less erotic than seeing one another in a sexy dress or bikini.

No worries
 

Just relax and don't overthink it!

My wife and I always enjoyed being naked when alone or with only strangers around (lake, beach, sauna, ...)
Up to about 2 years ago we never saw any of our friends naked. But as we get older (30 now) everybody get's more and more relaxed about nudity.
So we've recently been to saunas and nude beaches with a lot of our friends, sometimes only two couples, sometimes larger groups and it was always super chill and fun. Nobody was embarrased, nobody stared or made any comments.
It didn't change our firendship at all. Maybe it even strengtend them.

And don't worry about your size, I'm a "grower" too. Just enjoy your time. No worries.

If your wife is reluctant it’s for a reason. And if it doesn’t work out to her liking, it will be very awkward in more ways than one. Between you and your wife and between both of you and them.

You want to know how to make your wife more comfortable, but you don’t seem very comfortable about it either.

You are worried he might outsize you and embarrass you in front of both your wife and his. If he is, you are going to have a lot more questions. Somebody else can’t answer how long it will take you to get over it, and if you are already concerned, you might not get over it. And that might affect the two of you.

You aren’t ready for it.

We ran into someone from my fraternity at a nudist resort. He was a few years ahead of me, so we weren’t in college at the same time. We had dinner with him and his girlfriend with all of us nude. We saw him again that fall during homecoming. His daughter was with him deciding if she wanted to go to the same school. We talked while waiting for burgers during the homecoming parade and then back at the fraternity house party later. No issues, but we had already been nudists for a few years by this time. That resort is now closed, but we have a site at another nudist resort now. Now if we see him or any other friends at the resort we can invite them to come see our site and have a drink or two.

Most guys have the worries you describe before their first time going nude in public, not later. You don’t mention the name of the resort, but if it is affiliated with a true nudist group (AANR or TNS in the US, BN in the UK, or INF-FNI internationally) then I don’t see why you should be worried about size. It shouldn’t matter at all.

What I have told newbies to nudist resorts...the most difficult time is the last 500 yards to the gate of the resort, once in they are hooked.

Nude with friends
 

I may have written about this somewhere here, but when we were much younger we went on holiday to Belgium, there was a park with cottages and when we booked knew there was a spa complex. What we didn’t know was it was a nude, and no exceptions.

Of the other couple the girl was a colleague of mine, she had been to our wedding, but on her own. Her bf was fairly new and we didn’t know him at all really.

In the cottage we shared there were two bedrooms and we were pretty relaxed, both couples, us and them were young and horny. We disappeared to our rooms and fucked during the day and at night both beds were rattling, happy memories.

However the spa afternoon came round and we went in to discover it was nude and no exceptions - we were pretty brave, the other girl said would go topless and keep a towel on round her waist, my wife said similar so that was decision made. It was fantastic.

To saw her tits for the first time, her full bush and lips getting out the jacuzzi and in the sauna and steam room, the towels became quickly redundant!

The op mentions his size - I am a grower too but I just got on with it. I know she looked she made a comment about me being circumcised after the holiday so definitely looked but her bf was significantly bigger than me. I did feel a bit awkward but I was seeing things for the first time of her and didn’t really think about it.

My advice enjoy it, hopefully your wife will come round and go. We still get on great with the girl ( they split up) but now a married mum too. Hope that helps.

Kew West
 

We stayed in Key West with a couple we had only know 6 months because are kids were friends from sports. First day there we were drinking all day. When we got back to our house I stripped naked without warning and jumped in our private pool. Husband said cool and did the same. It was dark but visible from the pool light. His wife says OK I guess were taking this friendship to the next level and her & my wife were naked in the pool. The pool was so cold we only lasted 10-15 minutes. We stayed on the patio for one last beer before bed. The girls were topless with towel around the waste and guys stayed nude. My erect penis is above average but I looked like a tiny turtle head coming out of its shell because of the cold water. There was nothing there but head. The other guy had a very impressive semi going on. No one cared or noticed but me.

The funny part is that a picture of the four of us was taken that night, girls topless guys nude. This picture was in a slide show I made for us to view about two months later. The four of us watching on a big screen TV and this picture appears. My wife starts laughing hits pause, walked to screen and points at my tiny turtle head and says to the other wife " believe me it gets much bigger than this when I need it too".

Don't worry about size your wife didn't marry you for the size of your cock.

Make sure your wife understands that the worst part of going nude for the first time is just BEFORE you do it! Afterwards she'll be the same as everyone else, and after a few minutes of wandering around, talking to people, engaging in various activities etc, she'll forget she's even naked.

And remember that all conversations will be at eye level so nobody's checking out each others bits!

Acceptance
 

People in our nudist group of friends would occasionally bring an invited "textile" couple to our nudist camp. The men would usually get nude right away without further ado.

For some reason the women were usually reluctant to shed all of their clothing. Even though they were sitting and socializing with the other 4 completely nude women in our group. What were they shy about: All of the women there had tummies, breasts, butts, pussies and blemishes.

After a short while they would ease up and take it all off. However, some would continue to "hide" themselves by wrapping up in a towel or paraeo. They did not realize that being the only one covered up would bring more attention to themselves.

My wife thinks it was because of the perfect image promoted by beauty and clothing TV ads. On occasion she would hear one of them remark about being overweight, their butt or breast size, scars and wrinkles, and even their tampon string showing.

And as it turns out all of the women ( and men ) in our group had all of those "defects", too. We all just accepted our bodies as they were and got on with enjoying the nude life with friends and family.

Watch what you say afterward
 

If you do get to go, have a good time. But afterwards, like if you're at a non-nude social event and the other couple shows up, it will be OK to talk with that couple about your shared nude experience, but NOT in the presence of others. The couple you were nude with might not like others knowing about it, so respect that if they want to keep it under wraps.

Now go and enjoy yourselves.

I used to belong to a C/O non-landed club; and we'd have a fair amount of shy/reluctant newbie wives. They'd often start out in a T-shirt and shorts, or sarong. What would typically happen is they would interact with the nude women; and after a while would start getting self-conscious about hiding from women who weren't hiding from them - or being the only one covered. Some of the women in the club were really good at addressing these newbie's fears and encouraging them into joining in. It was pretty rare that a newbie didn't end up naked by the end of the day.

Sometimes all that's needed is a gentle nudge from a kind female nudist. That's exactly what happened with my ex. She was encouraged to loosen up her sarong; it fell off, and she was fine staying nude once that band-aid had been ripped off.

Being NUDE with anybody depends on the Person!
 

My wife and I have been a few places that we were with friends or neighbors, then had the chance to go on an Adult Cruise with my wife's cousin and her hubby! They have went a few times before and had asked Us, but we had always made excuses and never went but have later heard of their exciting adventures!
It seemed like my wife's cousin broke Us on more of the info about these Cruise and what to expect, then we were told it was for Adult's Only!
The more we heard from my wife's cousin, the more that made me wanna go since she is Busty in her clothing and I would just love seeing her showing those charms on the Tanning deck that they told Us about so you could get a nice all over Tan before stopping off at the Clothing optional Beaches!
While hearing more about what they had done before on these Adult adventures, I got the thought that they were just like Us with being open minded and wanted to add more Spice to their life by sharing some of the pleasures!
I never know what to expect from my wife talking after she had a few drinks and her cousin was the same way!
My wife had mentioned that I might get an erection if I seen some busty women ether on the Beach or on the tanning deck! My wife's cousin said that wasn't any problem at all and it happens lots of times and the people just ignore it or they can take some type of action?
After telling my wife if that's the only reason why we don't go, my wife's cousin said she'll take care of it as long as it was Ok with my wife? So then my wife agreed to it and made a deal that she'll do the same for her cousin's hubby in return!~
But for my 1st time going on they all went up to the tanning deck before me, I was a bit nervous!
On the deck I seen plenty of women either all Nude or Topless, then I spotted my wife and her cousin & hubby!
They were all Nude with the cousin's hubby sitting between the wife's, I took plenty of time to see and enjoy my wife's cousin showing her Busty beauty and trimmed Beaver off as well as my wife doing the same!
What amazed me was the cousin's hubby was looking at both wife's and he was as limp as normal~
Maybe it was just my mindset of being too over impressed by finally seeing my wife's cousin showing her tits and more then I Dreamed about? But I got a nice erection and told them I'll have to excuse myself, going back to our room. I had a knock on the door a short time later and it was my wife's cousin checking Up on me.
She took he robe off and did the same for me, asking if I wanted to enjoy some SEX on the bed? When I told her my wife might be back soon, she said my wife is with her hubby in their room and enjoying SEX too!
So all I can say is it might just depend on the individual person, cause you can be Shy or outgoing!
My wife told me that she been to Nudist Resorts in her early days because her GF's parents were Nudist along with most of their family members too! I heard plenty of stuff and seen pics from what that GF's mom had taken at their Cottage at the Lake!
At many of these places they might have a BAR and they also have people there that start up games to play and keep the action going! Having my wife get Up on the BAR counter all Nude and the BAR Tender pouring shots in her Private places, then asking others to come Up and enjoy a body shot was real exciting for her and Me too just watching!
I hope this helps some out with what to think about and if they have the same interest?
:)

Two types of places/events have, so far, been described.
- 1michael's "Adult Cruise" seems to be open to swinging and eroticised nudity.
- most other people have described genuine naturist/nudist resorts which are affiliated to AANR, BN or INF, where the nudity is not sexualised - and if that is what you are expecting/hoping for then you will be disappointed.

The problems arise when people go to the wrong place with the wrong expectations or behaviour. eg sexualised nudity or swinging behaviour in public at genuine naturist/nudist places will get you thrown out.

How do you tell the difference beforehand? It will be genuinely naturist/nudist if is affiliated with AANR, BN or INF; or if it is "family friendly" and children are welcome.

We read your story of your exploits on an Adults Only cruise. We assume that your involuntary erection leading to a wife swapping sexual event was part of a previously agreed arrangement with your wife and cousin.

While this thread is "Advice for First Time Nudists", we hope that anyone contemplating participation in social nudity doesn't get the wrong idea as to what nudist facilities are about. We don't mean to get preachy here, but really don't want potential new nudists to get the wrong impression of what wholesome social nudity is like. In our case, the rare unwanted erection is dealt with by a change in stimulius: covering with a towel and a distracting activity, such as playing cards or reading a magazine.

Nudists, like everyone else, enjoy watching people and like to be noticed and themselves found to be attractive. That is part of social interaction. Getting sexual pleasure from seeing others or being seen is usually reserved for facilities designed for more sexually charged activities.

Sexual encounters do happen on nude cruises and nudist resorts; and they also happen at Disney World or the local supermarket. Nudists are not against sexuality but recognize that there are appropriate times and places to experience it. We engage in sexual activity at a nude facility with the same levels of public discretion and decency as you would in any textile environment. These activities are usually descrete and conducted in private locations.

Nudists are not asexual anymore than the average "textile" person, but they do know how to distinguish sexual nudity from non sexual nudity. They believe that simple nudity does NOT equal sex and do not confuse the presence of a nude person as some form of implied consent or invitation for sexual behavior. Over the long term, living nude is probably no more sexual than the textile lifestyle. It is believed that most textile people tend see nudity as a sexual overture because they do not experience nudity in everyday situations and only enter some state of nudity when engaging in sex.

Once again, sorry to sound preachy or "holier than thou", but as lifelong nudists we wanted to point out that even though we have had our own sexual exploits over the years, our clothsfree lifestyle has been mostly wholesome and no different than that of any other textile family. As my wife likes to say: Its like "Father Knows Best" except everyone is nude.

I've not been to a resort, but I have gone many times to a nude beach nearby with my wife and her girlfriends. We were nervous the first time we went alone, for sure. It is a vulnerable position to be in, and if someone says the first time they did something like this that they were not a little nervous, they are not telling the truth. Every single person we took with us was as nervous or more nervous than we were the first time. Everyone relaxed and enjoyed themselves in the end.

Can seeing mutual friends naked be weird going forward...absolutely. But only if both of you make it that way. You say strictly platonic, and if that also means no other sexual motives, then I think you will be fine. If you have some other reason and you're just saying the platonic part, maybe this isn't a good idea for you.

Also, how well do you really know this couple? Are they asking to go with you because you've talked about the hot springs, and they think you're the couple to help guide them? If so, maybe you need to set that straight.

How devastated would you be if you stopped being friends/cut ties after your trip? If the answer is completely devastated, why chance it? Say no thank you, and don't look back.

I'm not calling you out, but is it really your wife that is uncomfortable. You shared why you're nervous, and it honestly seems like that is the real reason. If that is it... only you can answer how weird it could be and if you can get over it.

My wife, myself, and other couple decided to go to a nude beach together.......first time for all of us.
My wife wasn't real crazy about the idea about being nude around other people, but gave in and she would go but was only going to take her top off.

It was a hot day when we got to the beach....we set up an umbrella and some beach towels. I was pretty warm and quickly stripped down and went out for a swim. Next thing I see is my totally naked wife and my friend heading out
into the water towards me.

I guess it didn't take long for her to lose her inhibitions about going naked around a bunch of people.
Once she saw everyone else she decided she would just blend into the crowd.
Now we boat, fish, and swim naked often and go to the nude beach several times a year.

Seems once you break the ice, it's no big deal after that.

It's a common outcome.

My wife was no exception - even though she wasn't too keen on being see naked on her very first visit to a nudist resort.
Once she walked into the pool area, tightly wrapped in her towel, and saw that everyone there was naked, she started to feel "self-conscious about being self-conscious." But it was really when people there started interacting with her that a "switch" went off. They didn't show any shyness about being naked in front of her while chatting, and she felt she should "level with them" and "blend in." We'd started a conversation with a friendly naked couple by the pool when my wife just turned towards a lounge chair behind us, tossed her towel on it; and resumed the conversation completely naked in front of them. By the end of the day she'd almost forgotten she'd stayed naked the rest of the day.

When everyone is nude, it's hard to resist joining in.

One example that comes to mind, is when a female friend (I'm male) I'd known for years visited me at a festival. We went to the on-site beach for a swim and I got naked just like always, and just like maybe 80-90% of the others there but my friend wore a one piece swim suit. So it was CFNM rather than her being naked too, but anyway the friendship wasn't negatively affected in any way. We have deeper conversations since that event and are more open towards each other, but everyone's experience will be different of course.

In your situation I'd first make sure that it's a non sexual resort and if so, go for it.

That's why bikinis are best. Far more likely for at least topless when all around are nude if the options there.

My wife has got her tits out in front of male friends before, before I knew her. Their relationship is fine. One of them mentions it every now and again. My wife pretends to be shocked. No issues, just a bit if fun.

Nice
 

Nicely said!