MY WIFE SAYS MOST WOMEN DO NOT LIKE GIVING BLOWJOBS. IS THIS TRUE?
 

:confused:I would like to know what the men and women on OCC have to say about this.

BACKGROUND AND CONTEXT:
I need your input.

My wife comes from a very conservative background and so have most of her friends, including her best friend. She will suck my cock, but is reluctant.

When we talk about it, she always goes to the same statement, and I don't have a way to refute it. That is where YOU come in. She always says, "Most women don't like to give blowjobs. They just do it because the man wants them to." I wonder if that means she and her best friend have decided this, or is it true of most women?

For the women: Do you find this to be true? Are the majority of the BJ pics on OCC really gals only doing it to please their guy, but they would prefer to not? What do your friends have to say about it?


For the men: What does your wife/girlfriend have to say about it? (IF you can get her to talk about it!)

For the married men: Has your wife changed her perspective now that you are married? If you can get it out of her, what do your wife's friends say?

Be honest. If you don't know, don't guess. Just because she ACTS like she likes it, that does not mean she really does. Even if we realize they are only doing it to please us, there is a whole new element of cool about that!

What say you?

DOES SHE SHOUT WHEN SHE SAYS THAT TOO?

:)

Sorry, but caps-lock does violence to my eyes!

I think the position she holds ("most women don't like it") is hard to prove either way. One could do surveys, but the real issue is that EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT (caps intended) in their approach to sex and oral sex in particular. I have known and loved women who absolutely love giving head, so I can say that they DO exist. I have also loved women who don't prefer to do it, but saved it for special occasions or meaningful moments. So I know that your wife is not alone. But to make a general rule, seems like a mistake to me.

Anyone who bases their position about what they will or won't do with/to a loved one, on what OTHER people will or won't do, seems to me to be very sex-negative and normative, where they care too much about what is "normal" as if other people actually saw and cared what a private couple does together. I think there is too much of that poor attitude in the world, to my tastes.

I say, it's all about what the 2 of you like together. Pay no attention to what's "typical" because that's hard to define and always changing.

This is a really good pub/ dinner conversation topic, right up there with 'how many men would you need before you called it a gang-bang?'

The general response seems to be that giving blow-jobs doesn't do a lot for women and many participate mainly in the hope we'll reciprocate.

That said there are obviously women who do so with a great deal more enthusiasm or with a great deal more skill, not always the same thing, than others.

A friend noted some years ago that a lot of the ladies who have both enthusiasm and skill come from backgrounds where virginity before marriage is still very important.

The older we get, the more my wife does bjs instead of plain ol' screwing. Not sure why, other than she's in control more with the bj. Never asked her why since I'm happy.

I have 2 comments on this subject - I had a female friend who once told me that when she was married she hated sucking cock, but now she wants to tell him how much she loves it.

As for my wife, she can reach orgasm sucking cock. The other night I took the back of her head, pushed it further down my cock, and proceeded to fuck her mouth. She had a massive orgasm and told me how much she likes that. She says she is not only turned on to have a cock in her mouth, but she likes to make love to it!

I definitely am not complaining. I am just trying to find a different way to approach it and see if there is a perspective that I can give her that puts us on the same team.

She has come a long way over the years. For the first several years of our marriage she didn't think she could have an orgasm. She was really sensitive about it. One day I carefully presented with the idea that I could try using a vibrating back massager to bring her to orgasm. It worked. It was truly life altering and exciting as I used this big clunky three points back massager on her (which, ironically, was actually her father's) to bring her to her first orgasm.

Before that, she wouldn't ever let me go down on her, so asking her to blow me required begging and was always met with rolling eyes. The sex was stressful, so the marriage was too. Since then, she really likes to have me go down on her. It has been easier to get her to 69, but she still doesn't love it.

I think Barmixer is on to something here. I want her to "make love" to it. From where we were to where we are now makes me believe anything is possible.

Well, in my experience, most women enjoy it as part of the overall sex experience. Some could just suck dick for hours and enjoy it. One seemed to enjoy it as much as gay guys seem to: on a nude cruise I was on, she sucked 5 guys to completion, one after the other, swallowing every drop.

DR

My gf enjoys it more as a make me happy, just like while I don't have a huge love of going down on my girl I lov seeing her response. I can eat her for hours and just watch her squirm with pleasure. She doesn't particularly love giving head, but enjoys how much I enjoy it.

When we started together it was maybe once a month, now weekly, just when she is going down talk about how amazing she is. People love reassurance... It's why we all love screamers over just sex with an unresponsive lump. If she sees how much you enjoy it, will make her want to do it more.

Thanks
 

I will take that advice.

NOTE: I APOLOGIZE for the bold caps, everyone. It is truly obnoxious! :D

I appreciate the conversation and advice from everyone.

:D:) My wife loves it .. She kind of makes little moan kind of sounds when shes doing it .. She will often stop while riding me and suck me for a while before getting back on .. I dont have to ask if she likes it .. When she is just blowing me she swallows wildly when I come like she cant get enough.. so... there ya have it .. :D

Of the first three girls I ever made love to, 2 never sucked me off. Those first three were short term affairs though. After that, all the women I've been with sucked cock, a couple not that well, but they all sucked me off. Most swallowed. I usually go down on my lady before she has a chance to do anything for me. I always do that the first time I am with a girl. Get her worked up, use your fingers if you have to, but then dive in and bring her to orgasm. Then do it to her again after you've had an orgasm. I've never had to ask for a blow job after following that routine. I should point out, I go down because I love the taste, the smell and the feel of it. I don't do it just to get a blow job in return.

I have been with nine women in my life. Only two did not like doing BJs and one of those was when I was in high school (29 years ago) so I am not sure it counts as she may have changed since then.

The wife does not like it, and does it now and again as part of her duties. Thus, she is horrible at it. I have had many lovers who clearly enjoy it, and I could tell the difference for sure. I'd say it is about 70/30: with 70 percent to the good.

TOUCHE'
Women will suck you into marriage, but once the have the ring (& entitled to 1/2 your assets), they never offer anymore! ...Especially after 40.
God I feel so used <lol>

I've given this some thought, and over the years, ( i've just past 50 ) ALL of the woman i have been with have given me blow jobs, and have appeared to enjoy it, out of all that i can think of, only 2 would'nt swallow, as i've got older i'm more than happy with a grope and a blow job, in fact my neighbour ( who' a lot younger than me is quite happy to blow me without us having to have full sex, she seems to love it she allways swallows and cleans any cum up with her tounge, i'm more than happy with that, ive always belived that most women will be as dirty as the man demands, i think you just got to insist

The comments about swallowing reminded me of a woman I knew. She was in her late 40's at the time and was reading a book that had a cock sucking scenario in it. She had never done it before, but decided to give it a try. Her husband would let her suck him, but would not cum in her mouth.

This led her to seeking more on the outside. She found she not only liked a load in her mouth, she loved to swallow.

dmk your wrong my wife is 45 and will suck me at the drop of a hat :)

mine is the same sept older ;)

I've been married three times.

My first wife only gave me BJ when we were in a group (foursome or threesome) setting. She would NEVER do it when we were just the two of us. She never let me come in her mouth - ever. She did, however, let other male participants in our group endeavors come in her mouth - swallowed some, spit some out.

My second wife was very much the same - but, I did get oral from her a couple of times when it was just the two of us. She only let me come in her mouth ONE time ... that was during an MFM threesome. She and I were in 69, the other M was fucking her from behind doggie-style. I was licking her clit. On some thrusts, his scrotum would bump my nose. She was giving me head ... I tried to warn her I was coming - but it must have sounded garbled. (My mouth was occupied, you see.) She took it all down. But that never happened again. She would occasionally give oral to another guy during MFM ... but rarely let him come that way. It was just foreplay for her to get him hard enough to fuck.

My current wife - when we first married - was a very sexual being. She gave hand-jobs, and blow-jobs ... and seemed to enjoy me going down on her ... but, that's all gone, now. Now, on the rare times I get sex, she rushes me - and won't touch my cock. Straight missionary or nothing. Resists me going down on her. Not a great situation - but that's my current lot.

Other than wives - I've gotten oral from many women. Some seemed to enjoy it for the act, itself. Some seemed to be like my second wife - using oral only as a foreplay device to get to the main event.

Oh - and both of my first wives LOVED being eaten out ... my second wife, especially - was multi-orgasmic from oral sex ... but, she didn't like to reciprocate.

Ive been single 95% of my life. Im now 48. I have had over 1000 lovers. Not bragging just a statment for the topic. I would say 75% of my lovers liked giving oral. 205 did it with reserve the other 5% just downright would not do it.
Any time I have ever been in a relationship (I mean exclusively) All of my women loved it. One of the exes I write about in this forum could have an orgasm from giving me head and not touching herself. Hope this sheds some light on the subject.

My wife used to give head rarely when we were young - now it is very common.
She sucks one of her boyfriends to completion and swallows and cleans him with her tounge most days - that is
one thing he taught her.
I know she messaged a mutual friend of ours saying she loves to suck and swallow.
Mainly she does it to me so I will fuck her & I am happy with that !

My other ex girlfriend used to suck my cock without any asking from me when she was
a teenager so in my experience most women enjoy it.

And I enjoy giving head to them as well !

Kajuk
 

1000 women? What's that, one per week for 20 years? Pretty impressive ....

Justifying their actions
 

[QUOTE=Larry27;1141012]:confused:I would like to know what the men and women on OCC have to say about this.

BACKGROUND AND CONTEXT:
I need your input.

My wife comes from a very conservative background and so have most of her friends, including her best friend. She will suck my cock, but is reluctant.

When we talk about it, she always goes to the same statement, and I don't have a way to refute it. That is where YOU come in. She always says, "Most women don't like to give blowjobs. They just do it because the man wants them to." I wonder if that means she and her best friend have decided this, or is it true of most women?

Very few women want to appear "cheap" or "sl*tty" (except when it suits them) so they will justify what they do to make it ok in their own minds. Therefore if they say that they are only doing it because the man really insists then in their mind they feel ok and their actions are justifiable. You can help the situation by telling her how good you feel when she does it and that you want her more because of it, this gives her more reasons to justify what she is doing.

The other point for men to consider is how attractive is it down there. Your chances of getting a bj are much better if you are very clean and smelling nice instead of all sweaty and salty. Also consider shaving or waxing the area as a mouthful of hair is not always much of a turn on, it maybe best to discuss this with her first. In other words try to find out if there is something that you can do to make it more attractive for her.

I agree with most of the other comments and the 70/30 ratio is probably accurate but many of the 30% will on occasions when it suits them.

wife loves too suck
 

My wife let me know on our second date how much she loved too suck cock. She told me it turned her on too have a guys cock in her mouth, saying it made her feel like she was in complete control. Before we were married she was with a lot of guys, including while we were dating. When we first met, she told me how she had dated her best friends husband, before he and her friend got married. She said he loved too have his cock sucked and have his nipples pinched. Whenever we visit her friend and her husband, I love knowing that he was fucked and sucked by my wife, I just wish I could spend some time alone with his wife, I heard she is a very good cock sucker and she got one hell of a set of tits. I love running into guys who used too date my wife, because I know most of them had their cocks in her mouth. Even a couple of my friends cocks found their way into her mouth before we where married, thats one of the reasons I asked her out in the first place, I knew she was a good cocksucker and an easy piece of ass. My wife is a great at giving head, she deep throats, sucks and licks my balls, and has this special way of licking and sucking on the head of my cock that just about drives me nuts. My only complaint is she won't let me cum in her mouth, when I am ready too shoot, she takes my cock out of her mouth and jerks me off on her tits. She claims the only time she let a guy cum in her mouth, she was at a bar and got very drunk, she let the guy give her a ride home, she invited him in, they started fooling around, as she was giving him head he started too cum she tried too pull her mouth away, he grabbed the back of her hair and held her, and shot his load in her mouth. So, yes my wife does love too give blowjobs, just don't cum in her mouth.

In my personal experience the younger the female the more reluctant they are to giving BJ's. The older they get the more they enjoy giving and receiving oral. Which tells me that at a certain level of maturity women understand that you must give to receive.

Now there are exceptions to every rule. I have met younger females who would drop to their knees with merely a smile and a wink.

I have also know women who felt a quick BJ wasn't really sex, therefore they were not breaking any rules and gladly gave them to special friends.


All this being said, there is such a thing as a bad blow job but they are a rarity.

Accurate records!
 

" 205 did it with reserve" Nice to see you are so accurate but surely a post coital cigarette would be more enjoyable for them than filling in a survey form!

Maybe the 5 was supposed to be the uppercase 5 key (20% instead of 205).

The poster actually meant 20% - if you forget to hit the shift key you get a 5 instead of %. That being said, I doubt the 1000 number. I am 64, traveled extensively for business, and I would be hard prssed to say I even met a 1000 women, let alone getting them in bed.

Miskey - and my experiences...
 

I think he meant to type '20%', but didn't hit the 'Shift' key when he pressed the 5, so it came out as 205.

(Sorry, didn't mean to pile on - there were no other response posts about the miskey when I started composing this.)


Myself, I've never been with a girl who just flat out refused to do oral.

There was one girl where we just never got around to it - the subject was never brought up, and next thing I knew, she was cheating on me, so I broke up with her.

One girl I went out with for about ten months was kind of whiny about it, but she'd still do it and swallow - I think she did because I reciprocated and always made her come.

Another one would do it sort of reluctantly; the first time she blew me she took it all in and then went into the bathroom and spit it out into the sink. I told her that she was supposed to swallow it, and after that she always did, but she was kind of whiny about it; she seemed to not like the texture of the spunk in her mouth and in her throat when she swallowed. She would never let me go down on her - she would always say to me "Just stick the goddamn thing in there." She wanted no foreplay of any kind.

My ex-fiance, Susan, was the one who introduced me to blow jobs over thirty years ago. The first one was exquisite, and I wanted more. It was her substitute for sex (I had to go down on her first, which I didn't mind) because she was desperately afraid of getting pregnant and had never actually had a cock in her pussy. This situation, in her mind, allowed her to say to me "I've never had a lover." Only later did I learn, partly through experience, and partly through meeting one of her ex-s, that she'd blown at least half a dozen guys before me. I didn't know then that a girl who takes your whole load in her mouth and swallows without hesitation has done it before.

I had a torrid two-year affair with a very hot co-worker back over twenty years ago. She was married (I was single at the time), and she had NEVER sucked the hubby off: she'd never even taken his cock in her mouth. Within a couple of weeks she was getting on her knees in front of me and taking me in her mouth. The first time I shot in her mouth, she pulled her mouth off my cock (I have learned that that is the first-timer's reaction). After that, she took my entire load in her mouth and swallowed it every time. It was wonderful with her - we'd usually fuck three times in an evening - the first and third times, intercourse, and the second time would usually be intercourse for a while, and then I'd pull out of her and have her get on her knees in front of me as I sat on the bed. I loved the idea of her taking my cock in her mouth coated with her juices. Sometimes I'd even have her get back on the bed and fuck her some more, then have her gat back down on her knees again and come in her mouth.

I've only been with one girl who was a virgin when I first met her. When I went down on her the first time, she was in heaven, and couldn't get enough. We had no protection then, so we had to wait until the next time for me to bust her cherry (only then, as I was about to enter her, did she tell me she was a virgin). Within weeks, I had her on her knees, sucking my cock, and again, as a first timer, she pulled her mouth off when I spurted. She did it regularly after that, including one time in the shower that was great.

I only had one partner who wasn't really good at blow jobs. She was an Asian divorcee who just wanted to be wanted, and would allow you to take her any way that turned you on. She wasn't good at getting the rhythm of a BJ - she couldn't start out slow and sexy - she started at the 'fast finish' speed. When she went off the pill, we relied more on oral sex, with a quick intercourse starter. She did NOT like sucking my cock after it was coated with her pussy juice, but she'd do it, just to make me happy. Eventually, to avoid the 'timing' issue, I'd straddle her and fuck her mouth. She always swallowed, and just to turn me on, she'd say it tasted delicious. Eventually, with the need to use condoms for intercourse, on a momentary whim, I pulled out of her pussy (I was bareback - just a quick visit) and fucked her up the ass. I was so thrilled with both the tightness and the 'taboo-ness' of it, that we did it that way regularly. Most times I'd fuck her up the ass in the evening, then have her suck me off in the morning. She never asked me if I'd cleaned my cock off (I always did), which was a thrill for me in itself.

My experience has been that if you take care of the girl's needs, they'll take care of yours, for the most part without demur.

NOT A MARRIED GUY
 

I know you only asked the married guys to weigh in- but I'm intrigued by the subject. Of the women I slept with in my life, all of them willingly and happily gave blow jobs except one. To tell you what sort of person she was- Her best friend, a gay man, referred to her as a "cunning manipulator." His assessment of her personality was spot on- as I finally learned. She seemed incapable of true intimacy in or out of bed -so I left her. I think if you love someone- you want to please them and you get pleasure from their pleasure- because you love them. Therefore any woman who cares for you will take care of you- and my advice to guys is to give back- as often as you can. :)

I enjoy giving very much, whether I am being used focefully, or if it is more gentle or intimate, or whether I am in full control. I always have. I was somewhat of an easy blowjob as a young woman as I was very late in losing virginity and wanted to please and be keeping boyfriends. I wrote my first posting on this topic. I am not having many or any woman friends that I speak of sex with now, but from my more youthful girl talk I am thinking 2 of 5 enjoy it, 2 of 5 tolerate and will go along with it and the final one will strongly dislike it. I have had men comment that they could be telling the difference. I have been as you say picked up or turned on by invitations for me to give blowjobs.

Wifey loves BJ
 

Hi Folks,

In my experience I'd say the number of women who do actually enjoy giving head is well over half.

I'd go for around 70%. Maybe I've been lucky!

My lovely wife gets off on it massively. If I tell her how it makes me feel and how good she is at it (Very!!) then I can actually feel her shaking as she cums. Even talking about how much I want her to give me a blow job gets her soaking wet.

And yes....she swallows happily!! Even licks the cum of my cock after we've fucked.

As others have stated, she'd never really been much of a fan until she felt comfortable in a loving relationship. And now my BJ's are daily....

TD

:cool:

So how would that work exactly Soni? Dudes just whip out the big dicks and say "blow me" and you are putty in their hands? I have really enjoyed your stories and already relieved myself fantasizing about your post here and looking back at your photos of your mouth in your other posts.

Size matters
 

Taking into account all the issues alreday mentioned I think a factor that is sometimes overlooked is physical attributes. Small mouth and big cock must create more discomfort and more reluctance. Also I think it depends on what a guy expects from a blowjob. Everyone knows how unpleasant it can be to have something at at the back of you throat and what the 'gag reflex' is like so it you're happy to have the top couple of inches sucked I think even the most reluctant woman would find that pleasurable. It's probably the fear of having that hand on the back of their head that puts a lot of women off.

My wife is a bit complicated. She enjoys appearing extremely conservative publicly, but is willing to be somewhat adventurous behind closed doors. Honestly, it took us 7-8 years together to come to an agreement on blowjobs :p I don't get bj's as regularly as I'd like, but just enough to keep me content, and they're very, very good. However, if I said she'd never have to do it again, she'd probably be fine with that.

The main thing is she doesn't like having control. Me laying back getting pleasure is fine with her, but being in control isn't in her comfort zone at all, though she'll do it. I've found making noise and moaning loud and various other things reassure her. However, there's different ways of going about it.... the other day she was laying down thinking she'd rub me out over her tits, when instead I grabbed her hair and fucked her mouth. She doesn't necessarily like that, but is definitely more okay with that type of oral sex and, in fact, orgasms quite wildly when I finish. :confused: Seriously, I use to stop when I'd hit her gag reflex and ask if she was okay, but she'd be more upset with the interruption than me forcibly shoving my member in her throat. 10 years in and I'm still learning how to work with a very sexually submissive wife who won't verbalize her desires.

As for past girls, 50/50. I'd say for every one that was on the "enjoyed it" team, there was one on the other side. One chick would do just about anything to keep me around, except swallow, never enjoying anything but knowing I'd stay for another day. My very last gf before I met my wife wasn't a virgin, but still very inexperienced. I hate to put it this way, but I taught that girl to love oral sex as much if not more than intercourse and she fucking loved it. Every guy she's done since me, owes me :D

Early on my wife learned to control the gag reflex, and actually enjoys having my cock down her throat. She loves the hand on the back of the head as well. I guess I am fortunate in that way. BTW - I'm about 7", but not thick, so that may help as well.

my wife and all my past girlfriends always sucked cock :confused: not all swallowed but most did also.

my wife loves it.. she makes a sport out of it..trying new things everytime, she loves me pulling here hair and pulling it up and down and calling here dirty names while blowing me :D

it was meant to be 20% Look like I missed to shift key

I dont have a lot of check marks on my bed post, but most would suck, of those, about half of them enjoy it, & those swallow, the others would spit, or pull it out just before I came. the ones that didn't suck were prudes, took hints as insults & were not very good in bed.

I'll agree with the others~ in my experience the ratio is around 70/30.

My (second) wife hadn't given much head at all when I met her. I guess it was never something that appealed to her first husband. We eventually got that straightened out though. I had to do a lot of coaching and telling her what to do, but she eventually got pretty good at it, and now loves it. Every time we have sex I know for certain my cock will disappear into her mouth for a good long warm-up. When she's really horny she makes all sorts of hungry moaning and grunting noises while she's sucking it, and sometimes tries to rub her clit at the same time.

I knew a hotwife couple about ten years ago. I swear, I think that wife would have been perfectly happy to suck cock for an entire evening, bypassing the screwing all together. She'd never suck it steadily enough to make me cum~ she'd run her tongue around the head, jack the shaft off, suck it for a while, suck on my balls, etc, etc, etc. etc. Meanwhile, her husband and me would just be sitting there on the couch, shooting the breeze about the weather, or baseball, or whatever, while his wife was down below, endlessly worshiping the purple-headed monster. After I couldn't stand it any longer I'd finally pick her up, carry her back to a bedroom and pump her full. Next visit it'd be the very same thing all over again.

Had a girlfriend once who could cum simply by giving head. About the time she tasted me starting to squirt into her mouth her whole body would start convulsing in orgasmic waves. Now she was a fun girl.