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  #1  
Old 08-30-2014, 08:41 PM
1993wwe 1993wwe is offline
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Default Paige: The Unstoppable WWE Divas Champion

First time writing an ENF story. Constructive criticism always appreciated. I do know that divalover95 is doing an AJ Lee/Paige story and I don't intend to compete it with that. It just made sense to start with AJ since it is the current RL rivalry going on.

Backstory: Paige has won back the WWE Championship from AJ Lee at Summerslam.
AJ Lee has earned a number one contender match and it has been a usual build leading to their match at Night of Champions.

__________________________________________________ ____________________________

AJ Lee starts her skip to the ring, wearing her "Love Bites" t-shirt cut slightly below her breast and her traditional short jean shorts. AJ enters the ring and waits for her opponent as her music dies down.

The scream hits and Paige starts down the ramp. She is wearing a leather jacket and her red wrestling shorts. She climbs up onto the apron and lets out a large scream. She removes her jacket, revealing her red top and enters the ring. She holds the WWE Divas Championship up towards AJ, who eyes her with anger. Paige returns her stare with a glare of her own as she passes the title to the ref.

The bell rings and AJ rushes forward like a hell cat. She leaps at Paige and hits a Lou Thesz press. She grabs Paige by the hair and thrashes her head repeatedly against the mat. Paige turns it around so that she is on top of AJ and starts smacking her repeatedly across the face. AJ pulls her arms up to cover her face and kicks Paige slightly back. AJ turns around and tries to get back up but Paige yanks AJ Lee back by the shorts, showing a slight hint of a black thong before Paige rolls her up.

1!

KICKOUT!

Paige pops back up and AJ is quick to rise too. Paige goes to throw a punch only for AJ Lee to block it and respond with a right of her own. Lee hits a second shot. A third is followed by a fourth. AJ Lee's repeated punches knock Paige back into the corner. AJ climbs up onto the second rope and raises her fist into the air as the crowd cheers. The crowd counts along as AJ starts the ten punches in the corner. As AJ reaches the 7th punch, Paige hoists her up in the air in powerbomb position and walks out of the corner.

Paige stands with AJ up in the air in the middle of the ring and AJ desperately punches her to try to break free. AJ finally reaches and pulls on Paige's hair causing her to scream loudly in pain and fall backwards with AJ still on top of her!

1!

2!

PAIGE PUSHES HER OFF!

Both divas rise up and AJ Lee throws a punch, only for it to be caught by Paige. Paige pulls AJ's hand close by her mouth and bites AJ's finger! The crowd pops and AJ screams in pain and pulls her hand back, holding it in pain. Paige lunges forward and hits a huge lariat sending Punk's wife crashing to the mat. Paige has a sick smile on her face and looks at AJ's shirt. She suddenly starts tugging and pulls it off of AJ's body!

The crowd is cheering out of surprise. AJ is still knocked out but Paige holds the shirt in the air and faces it towards the hard camera before yelling "LOVE DOESN'T BITE! I BITE!" Paige tosses the shirt out of the ring and finally goes for the pinfall.

1!

2!

KICKOUT!

Paige rises and AJ starts to before realizing her current wardrobe situation. AJ frantically covers her black bra and backpedals into the corner. Paige rushes forward as AJ cowers in the bottom of the corner. Paige pushes her boot against AJ's throat and Lee has no choice but to take her hands off of her chest and trying to push the champion's boot away. The ref's count hits four before Paige backs up. AJ Lee reluctantly rises, clearly uncomfortable with her current situation but having no desire to lose the match.

Paige flashes her evil smile again as she starts forward. AJ Lee quickly kicks her in the thigh causing Paige to grab it in pain. Another thigh kick drops Paige to a knee. AJ Lee runs backwards and bounces off the ropes. She returns and hits a Shining Wizard!

Paige is down and AJ quickly goes for a cover, hooking the legs!

1!

2!

KICKOUT!

AJ gets to her knees, shocked. She is shaking her head while looking at the ref and holding up 3 fingers. The ref holds up two fingers up in response and AJ just puts her head down. AJ turns and notices that Paige is starting to rise. AJ backs up and waits for Paige to get to her feet.

AJ charges forward at Paige with the headscissors! She hooks it and turns it into the Octopus Hold! The crowd is cheering loudly as AJ has it locked in! Paige falls to a knee and is frantically screaming. AJ has Paige's right arm cranked backwards while Paige's left arm is currently on AJ's waist. Paige's hand hovers, looking like she is about to tap. Suddenly Paige's left arm shoots up and her hand grabs the back of AJ's bra! She quickly unclips it!

The crowd pops loudly and AJ immediately breaks the hold and quickly covers up, holding the unstrapped bra over her chest. Before she can react, Paige grabs her by the shorts and rolls her up again!

1!

2!

3!

DING! DING! DING!

Paige quickly rolls out of the ring and grabs her WWE Divas Championship. As she rushes towards the stage, she scoops up the Love Bites t-shirt. AJ is still in the middle of the ring, covering herself up while looking humiliated by her rival. The camera cuts to Paige on the top of the ramp with her championship in one hand and AJ Lee's shirt in the other with a large evil smile on her face.



__________________________________________________ ___________________________

And that's defense number one.

I didn't want to go too ridiculous because this has just begun but didn't want it to be too tame where it was just a normal match. Can't promise that this will be a weekly updated thing but I can say that more often than not I'll try to put up a new defense each week.
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  #2  
Old 08-30-2014, 09:41 PM
Dayjib Dayjib is offline
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I thought it was really good myself; you have a good descriptive nature of writing, one can really paint a picture of the events in their mind. I am also a fan on the "realistic" aspect of this story to start off with; nothing too crazy to start with, but it gives scope to expand and increase in the future.

Also as I stated in Doctor Ripper's brilliant developing story, I am always a fan of more Paige enf stories.

If I was going to have some constructive criticism, I would maybe have a bit more description in the big enf moment of the chapter (in this case the Bra unclipping), maybe make it a bit more of a big deal, really drive home the humiliation of the situation (although you did just that brilliantly with the minor enf, the top removal to be fair). However this is merely a minor gripe, and I also understand the need to rush that moment given how the story progressed.

Yeah, so for me, great work, and good to see another promising story looking to be developed on this board, can't wait for the next chapter.
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Old 08-30-2014, 10:01 PM
smjimmie1348 smjimmie1348 is offline
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Default Hey

I agree the Paige vs aj saga is awesome whoever may write it because they are what's best for business
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  #4  
Old 08-30-2014, 10:24 PM
hanskumoekk hanskumoekk is offline
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Wow, I can't wait to see if you plan to continue this. This is a great start and a superb first post!

I agree that you should keep the current approach to it, and like Dayjib says, drive home the ENF moments really good. You're a very talented writer, the ENF community welcomes you with open arms!
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  #5  
Old 08-31-2014, 10:02 AM
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divalover95 divalover95 is offline
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It's doctorripper doing the aj/Paige feud story. As for your story I think it's fucking brilliant keep up the good work, any new end work is allway's a good thing especially when it's this quality.
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Old 08-31-2014, 11:54 AM
smjimmie1348 smjimmie1348 is offline
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Hey I know I was just saying if aj tried to get her revenge it more likely will turn into a fued but great story anyway and we all cane wait to see what brilliance u come up with next
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  #7  
Old 08-31-2014, 03:20 PM
1993wwe 1993wwe is offline
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Thank you for the kind words everyone. And yeah, I meant DoctorRipper not Divalover95. I was looking at "last post" rather than "thread starter".

I've mapped this out and plan to make it a nine chapter story. Like I said, I'm going to try for one new chapter each weekend but mostly it just depends on my schedule. This weekend has been pretty easy luckily, so I'm actually going to shoot for a second chapter tonight.
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Old 08-31-2014, 04:08 PM
hanskumoekk hanskumoekk is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 1993wwe View Post
Thank you for the kind words everyone. And yeah, I meant DoctorRipper not Divalover95. I was looking at "last post" rather than "thread starter".

I've mapped this out and plan to make it a nine chapter story. Like I said, I'm going to try for one new chapter each weekend but mostly it just depends on my schedule. This weekend has been pretty easy luckily, so I'm actually going to shoot for a second chapter tonight.
Seriously, you've got all of my support and anticipation. Are you going to include other WWE characters as well?
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  #9  
Old 08-31-2014, 04:23 PM
1993wwe 1993wwe is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hanskumoekk View Post
Seriously, you've got all of my support and anticipation. Are you going to include other WWE characters as well?
Yes, definitely. This will be spanning a decent bit of the current diva roster. AJ Lee was only meant for the first chapter. The only real recurring character (at least in the beginning) will be Paige.
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Old 08-31-2014, 04:29 PM
Dayjib Dayjib is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 1993wwe View Post
Thank you for the kind words everyone. And yeah, I meant DoctorRipper not Divalover95. I was looking at "last post" rather than "thread starter".

I've mapped this out and plan to make it a nine chapter story. Like I said, I'm going to try for one new chapter each weekend but mostly it just depends on my schedule. This weekend has been pretty easy luckily, so I'm actually going to shoot for a second chapter tonight.
Wait have a second chapter posted tonight? That would be glorious mate, if you can do it that is, don't strecth yourself.

Also, the fact that you have mapped out a 9 chapter ark at this stage is really encouraging stuff. Really excited to see how this goes
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