[Request] MY WIFE SAYS MOST WOMEN DO NOT LIKE GIVING BLOWJOBS. IS THIS TRUE?

[Larry27]

I would like to know what the men and women on OCC have to say about this.

BACKGROUND AND CONTEXT:
I need your input.

My wife comes from a very conservative background and so have most of her friends, including her best friend. She will suck my cock, but is reluctant.

When we talk about it, she always goes to the same statement, and I don't have a way to refute it. That is where YOU come in. She always says, "Most women don't like to give blowjobs. They just do it because the man wants them to." I wonder if that means she and her best friend have decided this, or is it true of most women?

For the women: Do you find this to be true? Are the majority of the BJ pics on OCC really gals only doing it to please their guy, but they would prefer to not? What do your friends have to say about it?


For the men: What does your wife/girlfriend have to say about it? (IF you can get her to talk about it!)

For the married men: Has your wife changed her perspective now that you are married? If you can get it out of her, what do your wife's friends say?

Be honest. If you don't know, don't guess. Just because she ACTS like she likes it, that does not mean she really does. Even if we realize they are only doing it to please us, there is a whole new element of cool about that!

What say you?

[xxxxenophile]

DOES SHE SHOUT WHEN SHE SAYS THAT TOO?



Sorry, but caps-lock does violence to my eyes!

I think the position she holds ("most women don't like it") is hard to prove either way. One could do surveys, but the real issue is that EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT (caps intended) in their approach to sex and oral sex in particular. I have known and loved women who absolutely love giving head, so I can say that they DO exist. I have also loved women who don't prefer to do it, but saved it for special occasions or meaningful moments. So I know that your wife is not alone. But to make a general rule, seems like a mistake to me.

Anyone who bases their position about what they will or won't do with/to a loved one, on what OTHER people will or won't do, seems to me to be very sex-negative and normative, where they care too much about what is "normal" as if other people actually saw and cared what a private couple does together. I think there is too much of that poor attitude in the world, to my tastes.

I say, it's all about what the 2 of you like together. Pay no attention to what's "typical" because that's hard to define and always changing.

[onny]

This is a really good pub/ dinner conversation topic, right up there with 'how many men would you need before you called it a gang-bang?'

The general response seems to be that giving blow-jobs doesn't do a lot for women and many participate mainly in the hope we'll reciprocate.

That said there are obviously women who do so with a great deal more enthusiasm or with a great deal more skill, not always the same thing, than others.

A friend noted some years ago that a lot of the ladies who have both enthusiasm and skill come from backgrounds where virginity before marriage is still very important.

[malakabufo]

The older we get, the more my wife does bjs instead of plain ol' screwing. Not sure why, other than she's in control more with the bj. Never asked her why since I'm happy.

[Barmixer]

I have 2 comments on this subject - I had a female friend who once told me that when she was married she hated sucking cock, but now she wants to tell him how much she loves it.

As for my wife, she can reach orgasm sucking cock. The other night I took the back of her head, pushed it further down my cock, and proceeded to fuck her mouth. She had a massive orgasm and told me how much she likes that. She says she is not only turned on to have a cock in her mouth, but she likes to make love to it!

[Larry27]

I definitely am not complaining. I am just trying to find a different way to approach it and see if there is a perspective that I can give her that puts us on the same team.

She has come a long way over the years. For the first several years of our marriage she didn't think she could have an orgasm. She was really sensitive about it. One day I carefully presented with the idea that I could try using a vibrating back massager to bring her to orgasm. It worked. It was truly life altering and exciting as I used this big clunky three points back massager on her (which, ironically, was actually her father's) to bring her to her first orgasm.

Before that, she wouldn't ever let me go down on her, so asking her to blow me required begging and was always met with rolling eyes. The sex was stressful, so the marriage was too. Since then, she really likes to have me go down on her. It has been easier to get her to 69, but she still doesn't love it.

I think Barmixer is on to something here. I want her to "make love" to it. From where we were to where we are now makes me believe anything is possible.

[DRDavenport]

Well, in my experience, most women enjoy it as part of the overall sex experience. Some could just suck dick for hours and enjoy it. One seemed to enjoy it as much as gay guys seem to: on a nude cruise I was on, she sucked 5 guys to completion, one after the other, swallowing every drop.

DR

[TGSH243]

My gf enjoys it more as a make me happy, just like while I don't have a huge love of going down on my girl I lov seeing her response. I can eat her for hours and just watch her squirm with pleasure. She doesn't particularly love giving head, but enjoys how much I enjoy it.

When we started together it was maybe once a month, now weekly, just when she is going down talk about how amazing she is. People love reassurance... It's why we all love screamers over just sex with an unresponsive lump. If she sees how much you enjoy it, will make her want to do it more.

[Larry27]

Originally Posted by TGSH243

My gf enjoys it more as a make me happy, just like while I don't have a huge love of going down on my girl I lov seeing her response. I can eat her for hours and just watch her squirm with pleasure. She doesn't particularly love giving head, but enjoys how much I enjoy it.

When we started together it was maybe once a month, now weekly, just when she is going down talk about how amazing she is. People love reassurance... It's why we all love screamers over just sex with an unresponsive lump. If she sees how much you enjoy it, will make her want to do it more.

I will take that advice.

NOTE: I APOLOGIZE for the bold caps, everyone. It is truly obnoxious!

I appreciate the conversation and advice from everyone.

[Sacho]

My wife loves it .. She kind of makes little moan kind of sounds when shes doing it .. She will often stop while riding me and suck me for a while before getting back on .. I dont have to ask if she likes it .. When she is just blowing me she swallows wildly when I come like she cant get enough.. so... there ya have it ..