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#11
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More Limericks
There once was a monk from Siberia
Whose morals were most inferior He did to a nun What should never be done And now she's a Mother Superior. A gay young man from Khartoum Took a lesbian up to his room And they argued all night Over who had the right To do what, and with which, to whom. There once was a lady named Arden Who sucked off a man in the garden He said listen fluff Do you swallow the stuff? And she said, gulp, beg your pardon?" An Argentine Gaucho named Bruno Said there is one thing I do know A woman is fine And a sheep is devine But a Llama is numero uno. There was a young barmaid from Crale On whose tits were tattooed the price of ale While on her behind For the sake of the blind Was the same information in braille. The first man on earth was named Adam Who complacently toyed with his madam For on all the earth There were only two balls ________and he had 'em. |
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#12
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There once was a lady from Douth.
Upon returning from a trip to the south, Her father cried, "Nelly, I fear there's more in your belly Then ever went in through your mouth!" There once was a lady, who had a yen To diddle herself with a fountain pen. The pen, it broke, the ink went wild. She gave birth to an indigo child. |
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#13
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In Latin?
There was a young lawyer named Rex
Who had very small organs of sex When charged with exposure He said with composure "De minimis non curat lex!" |
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#14
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There once was a man from Madras
Whose balls were made out of brass When he struck them together They played Stormy Weather And lightning shot out of his ass. |
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#15
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Written in response to a friend, who bet me I could not come up with a clean limerick with this first line:
There was a young lady called Hunt, Who was not very big at the front. She said that the cause Was pulling on oars Whilst laying face down in a punt. |
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#16
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There once was a man from Adair
Who was doing his girl on the stair On the 49th stroke The bannister broke And he finished her off in midair. |
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#17
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There once was a man from Moline
Who invented a fucking machine It would convert or convex And fuck either sex And it knocked up his darling wife Jean. |
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#18
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Good poetry
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#19
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There once was a lady from Norway,
Who hung upside down in a doorway. She called to her man, "Just look at me, Stan! I think I've discovered one more way." |
#20
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There was an old hermit named Dave,
who kept an old dead wh*r* in his cave, you must admit she smelled like shit, but think of the money he saved. |
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