[Fox Mulder]

First this long time friend finally admitted she was "attracted to me in an awful way" (awful?) and asked what we could do about it. I was so stunned by the revelation I actually asked for a moment to think and talk about it. She said "Couldn't we think lying down?" As lovers, we were good for about two weeks. It was one of those flings that eventually ruined a friendship, but she gave great blow jobs and always had a super sense of humor.

Another classic line that has stuck with me...when I was in my teens I was very hot on a milf that I thought felt something too. Young and inexperienced, I kept touching her in small tentative gestures, trying to test the sexual waters. Finally, she said: "If you want something...don't scratch like a chicken. Ask for it like a man." That bit of barnyard wisdom stuck with me through the years and has served me well. By the way, after laughing at myself, I regrouped and asked like a man...and she said thanks, but no thanks. Damn!