Now that I knew my wife could be open to a bit of fun with others, the burning question was, how do I find a way to engineer something similar to happen again in the future? The problem being she was still in denial about the whole episode. She was deeply embarrassed about what had happened and no matter how much I reassured her seemed convinced I was concealing my inner disapproval. She could not understand why I was not angry with her, in fact she even demanded to know WHY I was not.
But there was no escaping the fact things had changed. Not only had she danced close with another man behind my back (no less!), she had also let him kiss her and allowed his hands to explore under her top and skirt. Furthermore, although admittedly under some duress, she had actually been prepared to go outside with him away from prying eyes. Indeed she might even have allowed him to go a lot further had she not felt so threatened by his over-powering lust.
Then there was the way she had agreed that same night whilst we were making love that she could not help thinking about him. That was an incredible admission for me to hear and one that sent me quite dizzy with excitement at the possibilities of what it might one day lead to.
It was like a tiny crack in an armoured door had opened and now my challenge was to find a way to push right through and explore what was on the other side.
Unfortunately though it quickly became clear that there was no point in trying to get her back with the stranger she'd danced with at the party. Because in trying to force himself on her he had completely freaked her out. The very idea of trying to set up some way of arranging a meeting with him was therefore a complete no-no. Not only that, she said she felt so embarrassed and ashamed of herself for letting him go so far she could never even do anything like that again.
But it was not all doom and gloom. I now knew that at least she was open to sharing fantasy talk about sex with others. I resolved that my best chance of turning fantasy into reality would be to work on her at bedtime. One of the ways I did this was by reading to her some of the lurid letters sent in by readers to (British) top-shelf magazines such as Fiesta and Escort about their swinging and wife-sharing experiences.
Fortunately she found these enough of a turn-on to get her juices flowing, so when we started to make love I would ask her to tell me which letter turned her on the most. Then I would get her to fantasise that she was actually making love right now to the man in the scene she was describing to me.
It worked every time and from that moment we started having the best sex ever. Instead of two or three times a week,all of a sudden it became two or three times a night!
The next thing was I started buying 'contact magazines.' This was before the internet and featured couples sending in nude photos of themselves together with ads for others to meetup with them for a bit of swinging fun. Although still somewhat disapproving of it we would look through these together in bed and I'd get her to tell me which couples she liked the look of most.
All of this was done on the pretext that it was pure fantasy, nothing more, but I could tell by some of my wife's responses that her resistance to the idea of swinging was very gradually breaking down. She would still insist she could never do anything but started saying things like, 'H'mm that couple looks nice' or 'Ooh I do like the sound of that ad, they sound just like us.'
Then it became 'Well I suppose if we ever WERE ever to meet up with another couple, they'd have to agree to this and not that,' etc etc.
This kind of thing went on for not just weeks but months and months. It was a very gradual evolution from her being resolutely opposed to responding to swingers' ads to being still against but at least mildly curious.
Until one day I could no longer hold out. I told her I'd actually gone ahead and written to one of the couples that we had agreed sounded interesting to see where it led to. At first she was quite shocked and annoyed with me, but to my surprise and relief her initial resistance soon gave way to both curiosity and even excitement. In fact I was quite surprised how rapidly she flipped from being resolutely opposed to the whole idea to actually being quite keen on it once she knew the ball had been set in motion.
Tbc
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